Today’s Show

We start off today’s show with…


“The Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. What a wonderful morning”, said the Uncle before reminding listeners that the telephone number “is (251) 479-2723, that’s 479-2723 or 479-2723”. “We had some people waiting through the newsbreak wishing to speak on the air”, said the Uncle before attempting to speak with a caller. “Is this the real Ron Wallace?” he asked. “Ron Wallace was there and I don’t know if something happened to Ron Wallace’s call. Let’s move on to the G-Man”, said the Uncle. “There has been a lot of talk on Mayor (Sam) Jones’ misfire on this” school board money, said G-Man. “Mayor Jones has not risen to where he is by shooting into the dark”, said G-Man. “It looks like—I saw one person on the news last night and it sounded like he was covering his rear end faster than he could”, said G-Man. “By the way, concerning Mr. Wallace’s campaign kickoff, did you see any campaign on the news or in the paper?” G-Man asked. “If I see, if I had the paper, my paper has shrunk”, said G-Man. “Did anyone notice the downsizing?” G-Man asked. “Yes”, the Uncle answered. “We have Ron Wallace back on the line. Now is this the real Ron Wallace?” said the Uncle. “Yes it is, Uncle Henry”, Ron answered. “Now how did things go when you kicked off your campaign at Government Plaza?” the Uncle asked. “Yes, it was on FOX 10 from 5:30 PM and 9:00”, said Ron, who was referring to WALA-TV by its brand name. “Now, is there anything you want to bring up, Ron?” the Uncle asked. “I’m feeling well and I’m happy that we’re doing [well]. And remember it’s all about change”, said Ron before leaving us. “So, good for them for covering the election”, our host said about WALA-TV, or “FOX 10” as he called the station. “Not many people realize that we’re in a city election year that’s coming up in the summer”, our host has learned. “Let’s talk to Bill. Hello Bill”, he said to our next caller. “I just wanted to mention that in times like these that we better be grateful that we have the current constitution in the state of Alabama”, said Bill before comparing the constitutions of California and Massachusetts. “We’ve got the governor’s race coming up and it looks like the newspapers are trying to support Bradley Bryne and Artur Davis”, said Bill. “Anyway, nice talking to you and it’s good to be in Alabama”, said Bill before leaving us. “Yeah, he pointed out that many people are choosing Bradley Bryne and Artur Davis as candidates”, said the Uncle. “He has not been a extreme left winger in congress, even though he’s a democrat”, he said about Artur Davis. “So it looks like that we’ll have two congress people running, Jo Bonner and Artur Davis”, according to the Uncle. “I used to live in the city limits of Mobile, I moved out here (in the county) a while back”, said our next caller. “Out in the county, during the Fourth of July or New Year’s Eve or whatever, you can shoot firecrackers”, said the caller. “I’m don’t know if they’re trying to pull the wool over the school board’s eyes”, the caller admitted before leaving us. “I heard you talking about what it’s like to live under city rule”, said the Uncle. “I think we’re going to hear more and more of the stuff you’re talking about”, said the Uncle. “I do think we are going to continue to grow, [despite] the economy”, the Uncle predicts. “Let’s talk to the other Glenn. Hello Glenn”, said the Uncle. “Who is in charged of all of those legislatures in the House and the Senate?” Glenn asked. “Democrats”, the Uncle responded. “That says it all”, Glenn responded. “So I am tired of all those people blaming Bush or even Clinton”, Glenn continued. “Look Glenn, I’ve got to take a break. Thank you for the call. Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. After the break and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710 and K. P., I know you use your computer to work on your business”, said the Uncle. “If we would somehow remove pornography from the Internet, probably a hundred thousand people will lose their jobs”, the Uncle predicts. “Now to ask a question about popular culture”, the Uncle announced as the Trey Lane’s theme music plays in the background. “One of these movies that keeps getting mentioned is ‘Slumdog Millionaire’”, our host told the show’s call screener. “What is this about?” the Uncle asked. “What are they outraged about (in India)? You read the news story”, said Trey. “What is the movie about?” the Uncle asked. “It is about a poor citizen of India who goes on a ‘Who Wants To Be A Millionaire type show”, said Trey. “Apparently, it’s a brilliant movie”, Trey continued. “Did you just reveal the ending, have you destroyed the movie inadvertently for [someone]”, the Uncle asked. “I hope not”, Trey answered. “I think ‘Rudy’ would be just as uplifting—Rudy!” said the Uncle. “Is that like ‘Forrest Gump’ ”, Trey asked. “Actually, that was kind of depressing at the end”, Trey added. After the call screener returned to his work post, “When it comes to entertainment news, I just skim the headline and move forward”, said the Uncle before the abrupt break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. When Norman called in about the bank, the Wall Street Journal saying that the bank bailout could cost much more”, said the Uncle after listening to two angry voice messages. “Four trillion dollars—now this is—I don’t know if my brain can even comprehend that, but that is what is being proposed, that’s what’s happening to the banking industry”, said the Uncle. “How can consumer confidence be anything but low with everything that’s going on in the economy. They just check consumer confidence on a quarterly basis now”, said the Uncle before bringing another scientific study to our attention. “The reason they are ‘overbese’ is because they are programmed in the womb”, the Uncle remembers. “You cannot afford to have healthy foods”, the Uncle continued. “It is because of our city planning that we are overweight, they tell us that we are not educated enough, that we are not smart enough”, said the Uncle. “Now we are getting another scientific excuse”, the Uncle reminded listeners. “I don’t even understand how they can say this. It just sounds like common sense that if you eat too much food, you will get bigger”, said the Uncle. “I have observed this, I am not a scientist, I am not trained like these people have”, the Uncle mentioned. “They are just claiming the virus makes more fat cells”, the Uncle explained. “They are claiming everyday it’s not our fault”, according to our host. “I don’t know if they’re figuring out a way to fight the virus, I don’t know if they’re quarantining people with it”, said the Uncle. “Don’t be surprised if next you’re going to have to have anti-bacteria spray or something”, he said before the break for commercials. After the break and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Let’s talk to Franklin. Hello Franklin. Good morning”, said the Uncle. “What I’m concerned about Uncle Henry is the drop out rates in Mobile County, that is very disturbing”, said Franklin. “They (parents) want the Mobile County Public School System to raise them (their children) for them while they work”, according to Franklin. “About the black majority in the City of Mobile, that was achieved mostly by annexation”, said Franklin before explaining. “That’s all I have to say today, Uncle Henry, I would like your word or comment on something I had to say”, said Franklin before leaving us. “Where are we going to be in 20 years, 30 years, 40 years with all these people that have not completed all the basics in school? How are they going to survive and how are we?” the Uncle asked. “I don’t have any answers to the problem because I don’t know you could bust into someone’s home and tell parents what to do”, the Uncle admitted. “I have no solution for it”, the Uncle continued. “The Uncle Henry Show concludes in the next segment”, he said before the break. After the final break for today and a couple of voice messages, with the first one being very long, “Well I’m—I can say as a public service announcement that the medication has been changed. Bill’s medication has been changed resulting in a very inexplicable voice mail”, said the Uncle. “Look out for him when you have the chance”, he suggested. “Remember to pray, pray for others and when you’re doubt of what to do, read your Bible”, he reminded listeners at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 5/10!

Today’s Show

We start off today’s show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Thank you for listening. Beautiful day, we are now at 40 degrees. Coming up later in the hour we will have a brief conversation with state senator Rusty Glover. His district encompasses a big part of Mobile County”, said the Uncle. “Let’s get back to Ben. Ben was calling in to correct some statements about history”, he said before the caller from the previous hour of the show spoke. “And again, Rusty Glover is one of the greatest state senators in the history of Alabama”, said Ben, who anticipates hearing the state senator. “I’m actually writing a book about corruption in state government”, Ben revealed. “There is a danger in not teaching history”, said Ben, who specified “the good and the bad” and used the War Between the States for example. “I hope that your listeners are really encouraged to study history”, said Ben. “Like Ron said, when you open your mouth (without thinking), you are really proving yourself to be a fool”, Ben continued. “As someone who is casually interested in history”, said Uncle. “What books would you recommend that are not bias? Or is that the right wording?” the Uncle asked. “The Real Lincoln by (Thomas) DiLorenzo”, said Ben, who said the writer has yet to prove something that is not true. “It’s so funny that people think that slavery was an institution started by the south in 1860 and was ended by the north in 1865”, said Ben. “When you read about the war, you don’t automatically think the war was started over slavery”, Ben continued. “The tenth amendment to the constitution needs to be repeated by heart”, Ben suggested before leaving us. “That was Ben with his perspective on this”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Chuck. Hello Chuck”, he said to our next caller. “I think Ben’s speech is true about this whole mess”, said our Chuck, whose call was suddenly silenced for one second. “In the case of where the first casualty of war is the truth”, said Chuck before leaving us. “I’m not sure when the web page will be updated, as we have had a glitch with our websites”, said the Uncle. “ ‘They’, being my superiors”, said the Uncle, are working on it. After the break for commercials and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. There’s a very unusual story out of Great Britain today. I mentioned earlier in the show that there [might] be an Obama baby boom”, said the Uncle. “These are their words, not mine”, he said before reading the story. “I’m going to have to go to my expert—I mean, people under the age of 30, the prime child bearing age for people. I’m not of prime child bearing age. Trey Lane is—or Mr. Trey Lane”, said the Uncle as the call screener’s theme music played. “Did you say viral?” Trey asked. “Vital”, the Uncle responded. “Are you detecting this in your social circle?” the Uncle asked. “Now that you say it, I kind of see it”, Trey answered. “There’s an optimism over people your age that you have never seen before?” said the Uncle. “Are you also seeing euphoria among your peer group?” the Uncle asked. “No, I don’t see any euphoria”, Trey answered. “We get fatigued with presidents, no matter what party”, said the Uncle. “That is absolutely true and we just got particularly fatigued with presidents”, said Trey. “Bush was kind of—I’m sorry I say, Mr. Bush, was kind of the terrorism president and he’s going to be linked with that”, said Trey. “Joe Biden has said there’s going to be test—a foreign policy test where some country tries to pull off an attack”, said the Uncle. “If you are a knife and can’t be sharpened, there isn’t going to be [any] adversity”, the Uncle concluded. As Trey Lane returned to his work post, “Trey Lane in his final year as call screener for the Uncle Henry Show as the Port Wine Stain tours across the country”, said the Uncle. “You never know [as] these bands break up”, the Uncle explained. “And I say this is going to be his last year on the show, as there is a 90% uncertainty with a 10% certainty of this band breaking up”, the Uncle continued. “Let’s talk to Norman. Hello Norman”, he said to our next caller. “You’re right”, said Norman in response to the news story from Great Britain. “I’m not saying [it]”, the Uncle reminded Norman. “It’s just going to be procreating more democrats”, said Norman. “Do you think anybody gets together with someone of the opposite sex to create more voters”, the Uncle asked. “I think ‘Lawrence Welk’ came on Saturday nights and I think it was the ‘The Wonderful World of Disney’ that came on after ‘Wild Kingdom’ ”, said Norman. “And it segwayed into the wonderful ‘Bonanza’ ”, Norman continued. “I know ‘Spin and Marty’ was on ‘The Mickey Mouse Club’, but I don’t know about ‘Spin and Marty’ ”, said the Uncle. “That’s a big money making machine”, Norman said about ‘The Wonderful World of Disney’. “The closest thing you got to something bad was when the Cartwrights were in a bar”, according to Norman. “Now that I’m mis-remembering (‘Gunsmoke’), I’m afraid to remember”, said the Uncle. Before leaving us, “I don’t know what’s going to happen, we’re just going to have trust in the Lord and hold on to your rifle, your gun because the democrats are going to be taking all your money”, said Norman. “We could use another Michael Landon”, said the Uncle as a version of the theme music from “Bonanza” plays in the background before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show moving forward here. It is a beautiful, beautiful day. Yesterday, I got the chance to catch up with Rusty Glover. People in the Semmes area, they really love them some Rusty Glover”, said the Uncle as music from the movie “The Magnificent Seven” is used as bumper music. “Here is a brief chat with Rusty Glover”, said the Uncle before playing his interview, since “the next session of the Legislature is coming up”. “Also, I have another bill, which will consider eluding the police as a crime”, said Rusty after explaining a driving under the influence bill. “They may charge you for reckless endangerment, but that is a low penalty”, said Rusty. “This is a bill that’s number one on the agenda for law enforcement officers all across the state”, Rusty continued to explain the eluding bill. “The attorney general is very adamant about this and I have another bill that—people were upset about the teacher in Washington County that was trying to get more money for her salary”, said Rusty. “We are going to be working hard, the citizens are going to want this done”, Rusty believes. “A lot of people are upset that their social security numbers are included on court documents, something that is made in public, and we’re working to get rid of that”, said Rusty. “And we are really working with Ben Brooks to really get insurance reform”, said Rusty. “And your district really goes south of I-10?” said the Uncle. “That is correct”, Rusty responded. “We’ve got Rusty Glover with us, state senator Rusty Glover”, the Uncle reminded listeners. “The budget is really going to be an issue”, the Uncle mentioned to his guest. “We’ve had a couple of newspapers, including the local one, push for support for [more gambling]”, said the Uncle. “I can’t imagine a statewide bill getting much traction”, said Rusty. “There were some people against gambling for moral reasons”, Rusty remembers. “The Indian groups are pushing some legislation for gambling reasons”, Rusty continued. “Any kind of bills are controversial that are very, very hard to pass and there is nothing more controversial than gambling in the state of Alabama”, Rusty concluded. “I know that with the economy, taxes are very unpopular. Do you see anything in the state of Alabama getting taxed”, the Uncle asked. “I’m not for any new taxes”, said Rusty. “We’ve got the most negative phone calls from people, I mean by the hundreds”, according to Rusty. “It was by the interest of people that wanted more tax money”, Rusty explained the telephone calls. “There’s going to be an effort through gambling and the grocery tax bill in order to get more revenue’, Rusty concluded. “Stay in session”, said the Uncle. “I will”, Rusty responded at the end of the segment. After the break for commercials, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Let’s talk to C. J. Good morning, C. J.”, said the Uncle. “Good morning, Uncle Henry. I’m disappointed that Rusty Glover didn’t call in here”, said C. J. “Well, he’s working during when we have calls during this show”, said the Uncle. “He has a opportunity to talk to us and face the people”, said C. J. “When he voted that 52% pay raise, that was it for me”, said C. J., who used to like our host’s guest. “I tell you, we really, really—it’s time for the change in the state of Alabama, not just America”, said C. J. After C. J. hung up without saying good bye, “Well C. J., good bye”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Tim. Hello Tim”, said the Uncle, whose caller is also known as Sam Marston IV. “I’m also for cutting taxes on the food, but when you do the math on the food, that’s not just a tax break on the food”, said Tim. “It’s more of a feel good no tax on the food”, Tin continued. “I guess any tax break helps”, according to Tim. “I feel good with any tax break”, said the Uncle. “But have a good day”, said Tim before leaving us. “Why thank you, Tim, and thank you for saying good bye”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. After the final break for today and caller Robert, “I hate to cut your short, but I’ve come to the end of the show, but I’ve always liked Rusty Glover. He remains a popular figure in the Semmes area. Thank you for listening. Remember to pray, pray for others”, said the Uncle near the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets an 8/10!

Note of Interest:

Folks, posts will resume on Tuesday due to unfinished business. Good day!

Today’s Show

We start off today’s show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. A beautiful, beautiful Wednesday where it’s 34 degrees”, said the Uncle. “I’ve got Pete Ream in from the Mobile GOP. Pete, someone—I did not want to invite in today, but he’s someone too qualified for me to turn down”, said the Uncle. “Do you feel any different”, our host asked Pete after yesterday’s presidential inauguration in Washington, D. C. “I haven’t really seen this new flow of optimism yet, but as we always say we wish a new president well”, said Pete. “Now we have a president making a move and—you had a call say this morning” trust him, said Pete. “It’s just really fascinating that we have someone call up there and make some excuses for an IRS appointee”, Pete continued. “There’s a difference, a difference in how we handle in the media”, said the Uncle. “What’s going on with the local GOP right now?” the Uncle asked. “Well, the local GOP is getting ahead for 2010”, said Pete, who pronounced 2010 “twenty-ten”. “The people that came out during the (local) election came out to the headquarters voluntarily”, said Pete. “They are very excited about the American process”, Pete continued. “They help send their ideals up”, he said in comparison to “the national level”. “Former speculation and chatter about the governor’s race saying he’ll run on both sides”, said the Uncle. “I think it’s pretty assured that one republican is in the race”, said Pete. “I’m impressed that we have a lot of good people to choose from”, Pete admitted. “Let’s talk to Robby. Hello Robby”, said the Uncle. “Hello? Robby?” said the Uncle after hearing himself on the telephone due to the radio station’s delay system. “It’s commonly referred to and known to most as the Lord’s Prayer”, said the Uncle in reference to a previous discussion I did not hear involving a university. “Once I get my doctorate, I will get yours and together we will pontificate on this”, said the Uncle before Robby identified the “first mistake” of the new president of the USA: the presidential oath of office. “That was really a bump for the chief justice, because the chief justice was really nervous”, said the Uncle. “It’s a plot by the republicans”, Robby claimed. “You say it’s a plot by people like Pete”, said the Uncle. “After the last hour, I feel compelled to ask if you are you a hate monger”, the Uncle asked Robby. “Now this was his second mistake, very glaring”, Robby said about the president. “There’s a world of difference. He wants people to pursue, chase after happiness so somewhere down the line Congress” comes in and helps, said Robby. “Let’s use you for example. You are pursuing a career in talk radio, so when are you ever going to catch it?” Robby asked our host. “I will reiterate what I said before. Take a look at that original meaning of the word pursue. If (Thomas) Jefferson meant that we were meant to pursue it, he would have meant to say, ‘The pursue of happiness’, not the pursuit”, said Robby before leaving us. “Let’s talk to Ben. Hello Ben. Good morning”, said the Uncle. “I got to stop and listen to your accusations of hate mongering and I appreciate that”, said Ben. “I have a quote today for you. It’s written in a column by Walter Williams, a black man who I wish was the current president”, said Ben. “And Walter Williams quotes at the end of his column, ‘That’s what Americans have given government today, unlimited power”, said Ben before leaving us. “(251) 479-2723 is the number, Pete Ream is here as the Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. After the break, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Pete Ream is here with the Mobile GOP. We are taking your phone calls. Let’s talk to Jimmy. Hello Jimmy”, said the Uncle. “I thought racism really ended in my own line with Rodney King”, said Jimmy. “That was a horrible situation with all the rioting and stuff”, said the Uncle. “Of course they (the police) really needed what they needed to do, but they went way beyond”, said Jimmy. “(Rioters) basically used him (Rodney King) in their quest to really become today”, Jimmy continued. As for the new president of the USA, “He just might be a good president, but he doesn’t go the way of policies that I’d go with”, said Jimmy. “I hope America is well aware than we think they are”, said the Uncle. “I don’t know if there’s anything we can do about that, but there’s people that (from) every sort of race don’t want to leave a certain point of history”, said the Uncle. “Let me ask you this, I keep getting comment about the chief justice of the United States or something making an error”, said our next caller before asking what the error was. “It may not be a mistake to stumble. I read with my glasses and stumble sometimes”, said the caller before thanking our host for answering his question. “Let’s talk to Tim. Hello Tim”, said the Uncle, whose caller was Sam Marston IV. “I am fairly certain that if you’ve given money to a democrat, you don’t become a republican”, said Pete in response to one of the caller’s questions before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. We’ve got a few minutes left with Pete Ream “You tell me you have a (Abraham) Lincoln day event coming up”, said the Uncle. “It was interesting that he used the first republican president’s Bible”, said Pete after our host admitted he can’t over the fact about the new president of the USA. “Do you have events every month? How do you all get together?” the Uncle asked. “How many people are involved with the Mobile GOP, your specific group?” the Uncle asked. “We have a couple of hundred people that are involved with Mobile GOP directly and we are trying to stay in that core”, Pete answered. “We actually have a reach of a thousand listeners”, said Pete, based on electronic mail sent. “I didn’t get the date down, but a Lincoln event and an African-American event”, said the Uncle. “All right, let me know when this happens. I’m sure people want to know about it. Let’s talk to Jay. Hello Jay”, said the Uncle. “I think people who want to look at history ought to be truthful about it”, said our next caller Nick. “I don’t know how much I give credence to people who say Lincoln said blacks were inferior”, said Pete. “I don’t know if we should cast dispersions on President Lincoln, [all though] there is stuff to look at there, but that is casting a wide net there”, Pete concluded. “All right, Pete, that’s it for this segment”, said the Uncle. “Thanks, Uncle Henry, go Mobile”, said Pete before leaving us near the break for commercials. After the break and a couple of voice messages, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Yesterday—yesterday on inauguration there was a morning service that Barack Obama attended, there was a rabbi and Bishop T. D. Jakes spoke”, said the Uncle. “I say to you, as my son is here today, my 14 year-old-son say, even though he speaks Scripture”, the Uncle quoted, he says, ‘The force be with you. “There are people in the world that claim their religion is Jedi. [That] is troubling to me”, said the Uncle. “And in accordance to ‘Star Trek’, which is an abomination, the mixing of ‘Star Treks’ with the awful ‘Star Wars’ ”, the Uncle added. “I just don’t like that and saw much evidence yesterday of euphoria. We here at our business, we were all here at work for the inauguration and strangely—there was a meeting, a mandatory meaning was called at 11:00, so none of here—none of here got to see the inauguration”, said the Uncle. “Live to the nation and the world”, he specified before summoning the show’s call screener “and cat owner Trey Lane” with his theme music. “When you left me, did you rush to the Internet and watch a replay of the inauguration?” the Uncle asked the call screener. “I was actually watching it before we got to the meeting, the inauguration”, said Trey. “Did you watch the speech?” the Uncle asked. “No”, Trey answered. “Are you an American?” the Uncle asked. “Yes”, said Trey before our host mentioned the previous news story. “It was Bishop T. D. Jakes that mentioned, ‘May the force be with you’ ”, said the Uncle. “You have not read it or watched it (the speech)?” the Uncle asked. “If you can’t find the time to squeeze that in as a citizen, Rush Limbaugh says tomorrow he will squeeze that in his morning update”, said the Uncle. “I predict that he will not be on the show next year due to his successful career as a member of the Port Wine Stain”, said the Uncle. “I enjoy reading a speech more than hearing it”, said the Uncle before specifying “dramatic pauses”. “Reading a speech allow the practice of skimming and skimming is a wonderful thing”, he said before the break. After the final break for today, the closing music from the TV program “The Adventures of Superman” was used as bumper music. “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. I wonder if an—I wonder if like 50 years from now there will be an inauguration featuring a Jedi prayer? Let’s talk to ‘Top Cat’? Hello ‘Top Cat’?” said the Uncle. “Hello Uncle Henry, I know I’m out of time”, said “Top Cat”. “Lincoln was, like one of your earlier callers said, caused hundreds and hundred of thousands of deaths in this country”, said “Top Cat”. “I want to talk positive in a way about Mr. Obama. Half of the people in this country did not want a left leaning liberal like him”, said “Top Cat”. “We lost the election”, he added. “Maybe if he were to overcome the enemies running the government and the Senate”, “Top Cat” suggested before leaving us. “Cool down and by gone, I will go ahead and see about adding to my stamp collection before prices sky rocket”, said the Uncle. “Remember to pray, pray for others and when you’re in doubt of what do, you will find all the answers within the pages of your Bible. It’s 10 o’clock”, he reminded listeners at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 6/10!

“One More” – TV5 meteorologist John Nodar

Today’s Show

We start off today’s show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues on NewsRadio 710”, said the Uncle. “One of the rare instances that we have not one, but three people in the studio”, the Uncle acknowledged. “We have Rob Holbert and Ashley Toland in the studio”, the Uncle explained. “We have Pete, our assistant editor”, said Rob. “He’s been with us since mid-June”, Rob explained. “This is something, it seems like you’re expanding”, said the Uncle. “Well Pete, where did you come from to be experienced?” the Uncle asked. “I come from South Alabama”, said Pete, who was referring to the University of South Alabama. “You’ve got the prestige of being at Spring Hill combined with being at ‘South’ ”, said the Uncle. “You were looking at us with condensation—those not in favor of the giant, electric Moon Pie”, the Uncle believes about his guests. “Well Ashley, you went, you went (to the giant, electric Moon Pie raising)”, said the Uncle. “I thought, I mean, the crowds looked great. It definitely had some problems”, said Ashley. “Well Pete, were you there?” the Uncle asked. “No, I wasn’t”, Pete answered. “We were watching it and flipping back and forward (between WALA-TV and WEAR-TV) with the giant pelican in Pensacola. The camera work with the [giant] pelican was better”, said Pete. “Let’s talk to G-Man. Hello G-Man”, said the Uncle. “Roll Tide!” G-Man shouted and stressed, causing one of the guests to laugh. “All right, G-Man, thank you for your phone call. I know you’ve done stories on the two Fairhopes. What about the two Mobiles?” said the Uncle. “Since you brought it up, what are your thoughts on the ‘string of pearls’ and its investment in the City of Mobile? It was his (G-Man’s) opinion”, said the Uncle. “Obviously at this point, I think it’s time for private investment”, said Rob. “I don’t think the city needs to be parking into giant projects”, said Rob before using the RSA Tower in downtown Mobile for example. “I can’t even remember the figure (price)”, Ashley said about the RSA Tower. “We’ve got some smart people here, allegedly, we can come up with projects less expensive than $400,000”, said Ashley. “I think it needs to be done privately, but in a reasonable fashion”, Ashley concluded. “Don’t you have any Dauphin Island Parkway readers of Lagniappe?” the Uncle asked. “We have some at the Zebra Lounge”, said Ashley before our host mentioned a call from the previous hour of the show, which was replayed for the question asked. “Ask your question again, I want you to ask it again and I want to record it”, the Uncle said in the recording. After the recording, “All right, Steve Nodine at Metallica. He said he was not at Metallica”, said the Uncle, who was referring to the Mobile County commissioner. “So you have people at Metallica that spend time—that were doing their own business spending their time and they claim they saw Steve Nodine”, according to the Uncle. “What are you saying, Pete?” the Uncle asked. “I was just teasing”, Pete responded. “I will get the ‘podcast’ audio and confront him (Steve Nodine) with the [claim] that eyewitnesses spotted him”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Tony. Hello Tony”, he said to the next caller. “Tell me what does Lagniappe mean?” Tony asked. “It means a little something extra for free”, Rob answered. “You hit the nail right on the head. I’m from New Orleans”, said Tony, who caused some laughter. After our host mentioned the musical group the Port Wine Stains and Trey Lane, the show’s call screener, “I’ve been wanting to call it the Port City Wine Stains”, said Ashley. “The people from Lagniappe are here, the Uncle Henry Show continues”, the Uncle reminded listeners before the break for commercials. After the break and a ridiculous voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues. I don’t believe they wear the dresses while they travel”, said the Uncle in response to the recorded message. “I think while they’re Azalea Trail Maids, they have to wear them 24-hours a day. And they are blow-up dresses”, said Rob before laughing. “Why did the Mobile Press-Register in the beginning of the year raise their price of their Sunday paper from a dollar seventy-five to two dollars”, our next caller asked. “A lot of their longtime writers have taken buyouts, so a lot of your favorite bylines are not there anymore”, said Rob. “Have you noticed that the paper is thinner”, the caller asked. “The consistency of the paper is the size of toilet paper”, he added. “It’s a little smaller”, said Rob. “There’s a national decline in daily newspapers and they are hurting”, said Ashley. “Those are different philosophies. That’s just the way it is. I’m sure they are just making up for it”, said Rob. “We are a different model, we are much smaller. They are not us, they have a different overhead. They have been here much longer”, Rob continued. “I don’t know, I’m not them”, Rob admitted. “The circulation numbers I’ve seen over the past year have been going down”, according to Rob. “Meanwhile we have gone up in circulation by 25%, just to point that out”, Rob mentioned. “It’s kind of a rough world for daily newspapers, so it’s rough for most newspapers”, said Rob. “When we started this (Lagniappe) several years, this was where newspapers were going”, said Rob. “Hyper local”, Ashley added. “And you are being supported by ad revenue, free to consumers”, said the Uncle. “We’re going to be relaunching our website very shortly”, said Rob. “It’s not going to be a reproduction of the paper, it’s going to be a daily update”, Rob explained. “All right, we have to take a break for news headlines”, said the Uncle. “If you have a question for Lagniappe, stand in line”, he said before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“(251) 479-2723 is the number if you have a question or comment for the people that make Lagniappe”, said the Uncle before speaking to caller Pete. “My particular favorite column I wish you would expand is the police report”, caller Pete before learning that the column is no longer published. “It seems like something you can get through the Freedom of Information Act”, caller Pete said about police reports. “I really appreciate your stories on the who-done-its”, Pete told our host’s guests. “You know the BTK killer spent some time here in Mobile in the early Seventies”, caller Pete mentioned. “I know many of my friends who are listeners to this show would like to hear more about the political who-done-its”, Pete continued. “I would like to see some more political investigating reporting and your paper would be appreciated more than what it is”, said caller Pete. “Have you thought about selling anything? Have you thought about selling the best of you featured in Lagniappe”, the Uncle asked the show’s guests. “We’ll get together after the show and we’ll talk it”, said Rob. “There are still a lot of people that like to hold magazines”, said the Uncle. “Ashley Toland, your column, the one that covers the Mobile city council, it fills in the gaps. Some people don’t know it feels in the gaps”, said the Uncle. “Do you think the entire council is safe?” the Uncle asked Ashley, since it’s an election year. “Mobile will always have a challenger no matter what. Do you think we’ll have a challenger?” said the Uncle. “Well, with the economy the way it is, it could be some unpleasant surprises”, our host predicts. “You’re in the business of selling advertising. Is everything going good for Lagniappe?” the Uncle asked. “Last year was a very good year”, said Rob. “Have you heard any names other than (Steve) Nodine as a possibility for mayor?” the Uncle asked Ashley, who only heard the Mobile County commissioner’s name. After the break for commercials, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. We have Rob Holbert, Ashley Toland, Pete Teske, all of Lagniappe”, said the Uncle. “Do you go expanding with stuffing the boxes”, the Uncle asked. “We have more in Saraland and the Eastern Shore”, said Ashley. “Do you suggest topics to your writer that we want to do a story on this?” the Uncle asked. “Occasionally, some things fall into your lap and you go with that”, said Rob. “What are some things you are working on?” the Uncle asked. “Well Pete is working on our sister city story”, Ashley answered. “People my age don’t get out and about very much”, said the Uncle. “So you’re going to do more of it, these budgetary stories”, the Uncle has learned. “We are really interested. Rob, especially in the judiciary in this town”, said Ashley. “You know it’s a strange thing here”, said Rob. “Now that you’ve mentioned it, the judiciary here is very interesting”, said the Uncle before the next caller. “How do you spell Lagniappe?” the asked after learning about LagniappeMobile.com on the World Wide Web. “I appreciate you both being on there and I have a story you might be interested in”, said the caller. “Let’s talk to George. Hello George”, said the Uncle. “I thank the Lagniappe people for discussing the Judge [Herman] Thomas case”, said George. “I’m sure they know that most of the things they find—they investigate are fragments”, said George. “I haven’t lost interest. I want to know why. I think the district attorney didn’t want to [be] involved because he was one of his brothers—his fellow attorneys”, according to George. “I want to thank all three of you for coming here”, said the Uncle. “Ashley, any more poetry from you?” the Uncle asked. “I hope not”, Ashley answered. “Remember to pray, pray for others and when in doubt of what to do, read your Bible”, said the Uncle at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 6/10!

Today’s Show

We start off today’s show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. A spectacular Friday morning underway with the beautiful weather, even though it’s colder”, said the Uncle. In response to a listener’s voice message, “Oh wait, we’re not suppose to say global warming anymore”, said the Uncle. “Mankind created climate change, that way if you get under the weather climate change, you can blame anything weather wise”, said the Uncle. “Even the very act of talking creates gases”, the Uncle continued. “Doesn’t make any sense”, he added. “I read a story that the solar panels, the way they make them, cause toxic byproducts. So the manufacture of solar panels harms the environment”, said the Uncle after guessing it’s going to “upset a lot of environmentalists”. “That’s going to cause some upheaval in California”, our host predicts. “There’s a story in the Press-Register today about a car jacking at a Shell station”, said the Uncle. “The victim was not injured, the guy was sitting inside his car on a cell phone at the Shell on Government and Ann Street”, the Uncle continued. “You don’t want to sit there after midnight”, the Uncle suggested. “I know that we all want to arm ourselves”, according to the Uncle before listing various weapons such as Taser stun guns, or simply “Tasers”. “Garlic, whatever you need”, according to the Uncle. “Let criminals know that you’re armed (by putting stickers on your car)”, the Uncle suggested. “You be aware of your surroundings”, he added in conclusion. “Now am I wrong to find this to be a frivolous thing. I know that a lot of low income people love to have the TV”, said the Uncle, who also mentioned the “friends on the TV”. “They need their friends on TV to tell them these things, they need their friends on TV to tell them whether to wrap the pipes”, the Uncle continued. “I just find this to be a frivolous thing to put into a stimulus package”, said the Uncle. “Once upon a time we didn’t have TV and we managed to survive”, the Uncle remembered. “I just feel like TV isn’t as necessary as penicillin. I just don’t. I know you say, ‘Well Uncle Henry, how do we know what to do?’ ”, said the Uncle, who was in the role of the listener. “There is a wonderful device called a radio that I endorse whole heatedly and I just find the radio much more superior than radio”, said the Uncle. “The pictures on the radio are much more better than the best high definition TV you could eat”, said the Uncle. “All the DJs up here that work at Clear Channel Radio listeners feel like they know them”, said the Uncle before using the show’s call screener Trey Lane for example, since he’s “right in front of me”, as he put it. “So the radio can’t replace the television in your life if you use your television as a companion or a friend”, said the Uncle. “And you say, ‘Well Uncle Henry, they have TV preachers’ ”, said the Uncle in the role of the listener again. “Well, let me introduce you to the AM band”, said the Uncle, as there are preachers abound on this radio band. “Well, with our $650 million in the stimulus package for TV coupons. This is essential to our country”, said the Uncle, who was using sarcasm in the last sentence. “I guess the same people that built Government Plaza built the Smithsonian are having leaks”, according to the Uncle. “Forty-one billion for special education school construction”, the Uncle has read. “Forty billion for public housing”, the Uncle continued. “Six hundred billion to weatherize gigantic homes. So all of that in the gigantic stimulus package. Meanwhile, we have a group that is preparing to sue all of this”, said the Uncle. “It’s called the Center [for] Freedom Works”, said the Uncle. “We’ve got to make sure that we sit back and look that we’re not spending all this money on ridiculous things”, said the Uncle. “Eventually the paper that we use what we called money you’re going to have a wheel barrel of it to get a loaf of bread”, according to the Uncle. “I know I’ve upset a lot of listeners”, said the Uncle before assuming what these listeners have to say about “fiscal responsibility”. Immediately before the break for commercials, “Well, I’m going to go ahead and not apologize for it”, said the Uncle. After the break and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. The telephone number is (251) 479-2723, that’s 479-2723 or 479-2723. The e-mail address is unclehenry@newsradio710.com, that’s unclehenry@newsradio710.com”, said the Uncle. “There’s been a global survey of the workplace”, said the Uncle. In the USA, “We are more sensitive to manners in the workplace and in Australia they are the most offensive”, said the Uncle. “When you do these things (listed), you are considered offensive in the work place”, said the Uncle before reading the list of behavior considered offensive. “Number one, not saying hello or goodbye”, the Uncle read. “Number two, not offering guests a beverage, number three, speaking loudly across the room, number four, using swear words, and then five, using your cell phone in your office”, the Uncle continued. “I hate to use Trey Lane for example all the time, but there he is”, said the Uncle. “His cell phone rings while I’m on the air”, he said in his example. “Let’s talk to Gene. Hello Gene”, he said to this hour’s first caller. “Something is bothering me”, said Gene, who still wonders about the next president of the USA. “It bothers me whether he’s a nationalized citizen or not. This is something that has bothered me for a long time”, said Gene. “Maybe he can pardon himself if he’s violating the constitution”, said the Uncle, who believes this will be a moot issue after the inauguration next week. “That’s all I’ve got to say”, said Gene. “I hate to use Trey Lane for example all the time”, the Uncle admitted again. “I have to move him so I don’t use him (for example) all the time”, he suggested for himself. “Now that you mentioned that, I wonder what kind of—isn’t it in a vault. Wouldn’t a president’s birth certificate be called an historic document?” said the Uncle, who wonders if the laser security “from one of the ‘Pink Panther’ movies” is being used. “I wonder if the actual security—the way they’re doing this”, said the Uncle before mentioning the Hawaiian volcanoes as some sort of security. “Until they take it (the birth certificate) on tour, this issue will never be dropped”, according to our host. “The Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710 WNTM. News time is 9:30”, he said before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“All right look, you accused me of talking smack and I am not a talker of smack, that was fact, that was simply fact. Let me, um, let me, with all the arguments I can present to you, the vast majority of the audience doesn’t want to discuss this ever again”, said the Uncle in response to a listener’s voice message. “Darth Vader, I believe his career ended with him being an emperor ghost-like figure hovering over Carrie Fisher and Harrison Ford”, said the Uncle. “Was it the case that the Ewoks were involved in this, that the Ewoks were singing”, the Uncle asked. “They’re Happy Meal toys. They went to the planet of Happy Meal toys to conclude the saga”, the Uncle concluded. “One last word on the stimulus package, Ron Paul has a new column on this. Ron Paul, Trey Lane’s favorite politician”, said the Uncle. “They are like a drug addict that has not hit rock bottom”, the Uncle read before getting to the next caller. “What started the whole thing with the ‘Star Trek’ and the ‘Wrath of Khan’ and Darth Vader?’ the caller asked, ‘I missed all of that’. “ ‘Khan’ has passed away”, said the Uncle, who was referring to Ricardo Montalban. While discussing the birth certificate issue, “It was very much a moot point. I don’t have to listen to it every day about the election”, said the caller, who said he never heard anything about the issue previously. “It is a part of contention with people. In fact, there have been lawsuits produced over this. There are people who want the birth certificate [released]”, the Uncle explained. “There are people who want to see the actual document and with him not releasing the actual document, some claim [he was not actually being born here]”, the Uncle concluded. “There is a guy named Phillip Bird, a Philadelphia attorney who has been claiming this for some time”, said the Uncle, who suggested that the previous caller goes to Google. “I check it all the time and every time there is a newspaper somewhere in the country with an editorial about it”, said the Uncle. “I made a mistake, I’ve been drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes inside”, said our next caller Bill, who remembered his wife asking, “Have you been smoking in the house?” “Well, I have been outside, so I guess I’ve been smoking in the house. So, I guess it wasn’t a lie”, said Bill. “I’m concerned about your contract and with me being an independent contractor”, said Bill, who suggested that our host hires an attorney. “You’ll be history and we’ll be a lost without you, but we’re going to have to move on”, said Bill. “Have there been any negotiations? Does it sound any better?” Bill asked. “The director of programming, Steve Powers”, said the Uncle, hasn’t made “eye contract” with me. “I made many attempts, but there is a generational divide”, said the Uncle, who said he’s looked at “as a relic” by one of his superiors. “They probably still want you on the program”, said Bill. “I wish you luck on the contract”, he said. “I think you do a good job”, said Bill, who hopes our host encourages listeners “to buy their products”, as in the show’s sponsors. While speaking to his next caller Chad, “Every time they do a story on the stimulus package on the news, they show the printing presses working”, said the Uncle. “The media, which doesn’t tell the truth about anything these days, they’re telling you the truth about this”, said Chad before returning to the previous issue regarding the next president of the USA. “For me, it just seems sort of like a technicality, it just seems sort of silly”, Chad said about the birth certificate and citizenship issue. “It’s the birth of a feather, Henry”, said Chad before leaving us. “It’s just a simple, honest mistake”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. After the break, the theme music from the TV program “Superman: the Animated Series” was used as bumper music. “Uncle Henry Show continues. Let’s talk to ‘The Tax Man’. Hello ‘Tax Man’ ”, said the Uncle. After Jim the Tax Man left us left us, “I’m just calling and I want to wish my father Reggie Copeland a happy birthday. He’s 80 years old”, said our next caller. “He looks very good for 80”, said the Uncle. “Thank you for your phone call. Happy birthday, Reggie Copeland, who is 80 years old today”, our host said about the member of the Mobile city council before the break. After the final break for today, Trey Lane’s theme music was used as bumper music as a voice message played. “Trey Lane”, said the Uncle. “Yes?” Trey asked. “What you running away from?” the Uncle asked. “I don’t know, Seduction Bomb is still a band”, said Trey. “They’re still together. So, that guy is running on false information”, Trey concluded before our host asked when his new band the Port Wine Stain will perform tonight. “Nine or 11:00, that is some sort of difficult (time)”, said the Uncle. “They should come out at 9:00”, Trey said about the show’s listeners who might be interested. “When is it tomorrow night?” the Uncle asked. “The same time, about 9:00 or 11:00”, Trey answered. “Thank you for listening to the Uncle Henry Show this week. We have ‘Ask the Expert’ next. It’s going to be a good one”, said the Uncle. “Remember to pray and read that Bible”, he said at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets an 8/10!

Today’s Show

We start off today’s show with…


“Good morning to Mario, Miss Bea, and all others. The Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. We did not have Captain Ron to make his full point. Captain Ron is on the line to talk about dishonesty”, said the Uncle. After Ron left us, “I can never remember ever, ever them (parents) lying, that, even in today’s world, not even little white lies”, said the Uncle. “My family, my parents would never—they would be bristled with anger even if would suggest”, the Uncle continued. “The idea of not being truthful to them is just poison and I know there are still people like that. We are in a different time period and our values are just vastly different. Let’s talk to Chad. Hello Chad”, said the Uncle. “Out of the whole entire state, they (the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People) give $500, I don’t [get] that”, Chad said about a donation to the Azalea Trail Maids’ trip to Washington, D. C. “I’ve seen the Moon Pie, I’ve seen it all, but evidently I have not seen it all”, Chad said during a different discussion. “There next four years are going to be interesting and scary to watch”, he said in reference to the next presidency of the USA before leaving us. “If the IRS came to me and I find out that I owe them $30,000 and I say, ‘You’re being small about this. You’re being petty’ ”, said the Uncle. “It was an honest and innocent mistake. Let’s talk to the authority on these matters and the authority is of course ‘The Tax Man’ ”, said the Uncle. “The government does a lot of things to people that haven’t paid their taxes in four or five years”, said Jim the Tax Man. “When I see these little young people coming in here to pay an awesome tax, I say, ‘What in the world?’ ”, Jim remembered. “Anyway, I just had to say this, this is just disgusting what’s going on at the highest level. I’ll talk to you later”, Jim concluded before leaving us in time for the break for commercials. After the break, the theme music for the TV game show “Match Game” plays in the background as a voice message plays before being undeleted, followed by another voice message. “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Ma’am, I believe the Moon Pie has definitely overtaken the azalea in the public conscience of Mobile”, said the Uncle, who was responding to the last recorded message. “If you want to see what Trey Lane looks like from head to tail to toe”, said the Uncle as he directed listeners a picture of the show’s call screener in the Press-Register. “A picture of Trey Lane holding a base guitar (‘pretending to play’)”, the Uncle described the picture. “And I believe I have on the line the lead vocalist and founder of the Port Wine Stain, Jimmy Lee”, said the Uncle, who was surprised the caller would be awake at this time. “I don’t actually own a radio or listen to—but I do appreciate it”, said Jimmy. “Why thank you. I’ll enjoy helping you by attacking you for years to come”, said the Uncle. After Jimmy’s call ended, “Did he have an overdose, was that a drug overdose?” said the Uncle before guessing we may never know for sure. “Well, we will know because they’re performing tomorrow night”, the Uncle quickly assumed. “Let’s talk to Norman. Hello Norman”, he said to the next caller. “My sister wants you to say hello to her”, our host informed Norman. “Well, good morning, Henry’s sister. What’s her name?” said Norman. “My sister wishes to remain anonymous”, the Uncle responded. “Well, good morning, Norman—er, Henry’s sister”, said Norman. “Sorry to get you confused”, said the Uncle. “I tell you what, if they confirm this guy (to be secretary of the treasury of the USA), it’s going to be madness”, said Norman. “Now you’re thinking small”, said the Uncle, who specified “politically small”. “Now we shouldn’t analyze this, they know what’s best for you. It just makes me sick”, said Norman. “God bless America. Y’all pray for this country”, he said before leaving us in anger as usual. “We will, unless the atheists file a lawsuit like the (presidential) inauguration prayer”, said the Uncle before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues and I think that’s an insult to the great actor who just passed away, referring to who should be his new companion”, said the Uncle in response to a listener’s voice message. “Ricardo Montalban?” our host asked himself using the voice message caller’s pronunciation. “Well, he was not—he’s not going to be remembered as Herve Villechaize’s companion, instead he’s going to be remembered as the greatest villain in ‘Star Trek’ history, Khan from ‘Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan’”, said the Uncle, who will be watching the movie on the biggest high definition TV he owns. “Here is an excerpt from ‘Star Trek: Wrath of Khan’ displaying the tremendous acting ability of”, said the Uncle before completing his sentence with the previous caller’s pronunciation of “Ricardo Montalban”. “It is very cold in space. Excellent! Now this is better than Darth Vader breathing”, said the Uncle before imitating the character’s breathing. “This guy with the Klingon proverbs: excellent”, the Uncle added. “Did you know that he also was a recording star, that he was an singer?” the Uncle asked before summoning the show’s call screener Trey Lane. “Congratulations on the tremendous publicity that you are getting for the Port Wine Stain”, our host told Trey. “You are the center of the picture”, he said, since the lead singer Jimmy Lee is not in it. “Why thank you”, said Trey. “Hey, Ryan (or Brian), I’m on the air right now, call me back”, Trey told someone on the telephone. “Now the Press Register had in this story that there’s going to be another group playing first”, said the Uncle. “It’s actually not a band, it’s a guy”, said Trey. “The Opening Bucket, it’s going to be the opening act for the Port Wine Stain”, said Trey. “Did you know”, said the Uncle before replaying the previous voice message caller’s pronunciation of “Ricardo Montalban” to complete his previous question before summoning Trey Lane. “My grandson knew him from ‘Spy Kids’ as the grandfather. So he’s multi-generational on this”, said the Uncle. “I’m going to play a brief excerpt of him singing”, the Uncle announced. As the song played, “What does that mean?” Trey asked about one of the lyrics. “His song is the ‘Chihuahua Choo Choo’ ”, said the Uncle. “What is your assessment on his vocal ability?” he asked Trey, who described the fellow as having a strong voice. “The e-mail says, quote, I think Trey Lane’s intro music sounds like a ’93 Ford Taurus”, said the Uncle. “I know a friend who had a ’93 Ford Taurus”, said Trey. “And again, I have a great deal of respect for”, said the Uncle before replaying the voice message caller’s pronunciation of “Ricardo Montalban”. After the break for commercials, a version of the theme music for the “Batman” TV series plays in the background as a voice message plays. “Well, I don’t appreciate you attacks on Batman and Superman like that. I don’t appreciate that”, said the Uncle in response to the listener’s recorded message. “Batman did have several girlfriends”, the Uncle reminded the caller claiming to be an “aficionado” of these characters. “I think he (Robin) did have some [sort of relationship] with Batgirl”, according to the Uncle. “You don’t want an alien from another planet dating Earth women”, said the Uncle in reference to Superman. “So your attacks, your savage attacks there on Batman and Superman: inappropriate”, the Uncle concluded. “Let’s talk to Pops. Hello Pops”, he said to the next caller. “I don’t consider myself a liar, but I’m a [pathological] white liar”, said Pops before using his response (“I like it the way it is”) to his wife’s question about her hair for example. “Well, if you’re not telling the truth on your thoughts on the hair”, said the Uncle. “What about does this dress make me look fat?” Pops asked. “The dress does not make you look fat. The actual fatness makes you look fat”, said the Uncle before Pops laughed. “What other example is there”, Pops asked. “A panhandler came to me one day. He’s been standing there most of the day and I had some money on me”, said Pops, who didn’t want to give him much money. “I guess I didn’t want to hurt any feelings”, according to Pops. “I guess nobody wants to tell them their hair looks ugly”, the Uncle said for example. “Anyway, just a couple of thoughts there and thank you for listening”, said Pops before leaving us. “I really don’t have the magic formula of what you should say without causing a problem”, said the Uncle. “Some people want to hear the truth and you say, ‘Well Uncle Henry, no they don’t’ ”, according to the Uncle, who was in the role of the listener. “That almost gets into a work of art talking about a woman’s hair style”, the Uncle continued. After reminding listeners he’s not “the right guy” to give advice on this subject, “You and I are on equal ground, equal footing”, the Uncle told Pops before the break. After the final break for today and a voice message, “Yes, indeed, I enjoy the ‘Manic’ music as well. You see nowadays, they don’t have good TV theme songs. Let’s talk to Barbara. Hello Barbara”, said the Uncle, who was responding to a listener’s recorded message. “If he (Norman) is listening, can I give you my number—not to come on the air and you give it to him?” Barbara asked. “Now why do you want Norman to contact you? Can we ask you”, the Uncle asked. “So you think Norman and his nephew and Amacker can connect you to the Amacker name”, said the Uncle. “We have ‘Ask the Expert’ coming up”, said the Uncle near the end of the show. “And remember on inauguration day, we’ll have Rush Limbaugh covering the inauguration (‘without commercial interruption’)”, said the Uncle. “Remember to pray, pray for others and remember to read your Bible”, he said at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets an 8/10!

“Hard Freeze Warning” – TV5 meteorologist John Nodar

Today’s Show

We start off today’s show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here On NewsRadio 710. It is a fantastic morning”, said the Uncle. “The local number is (251) 479-2723. The long distance number is 1-888-360-WNTM. The e-mail address is unclehenry@newsradio710.com, that’s unclehenry@newsradio710.com. I want to thank Ellen for sending me lots of e-mail. Ellen sends me a lot of e-mail on [various] topics”, said the Uncle before directing listeners to a five-year-old picture of the show’s call screener Trey Lane with a mullet. “Let’s talk to Emily. Hello Emily”, said the Uncle. “Why is it that the Azalea Trail Maids are having to raise money for the inauguration?” Emily asked. “Well, you have the City of Mobile, Reggie Copeland giving them $10,000”, said the Uncle. “They’re getting private donations as well as government donations, so they’re going to make it”, he concluded. “I think that things can look alike when it comes state to state when it comes to parades”, according to the Uncle before identifying the “bright dresses” of the Azalea Trail Maids. “One of the reasons (they were chosen) is because it is visually shocking”, he said. “There is a story that I mentioned in the program that I want repeat to the people who might be discouraged”, said the Uncle, who specified folks who have been trying to lose weight over the holidays. “We have news claiming that it’s not your fault that you’re ‘overbese’ ”, said the Uncle before reminding listeners of previous studies. “Now we have a new story out from scientists claiming that high-glyceride foods are highly addictive”, said the Uncle. “Now you say, ‘What kind of food is that?’” the Uncle assumed about his audience before listing biscuits and cakes. “Now we are being told that biscuits are as addictive as cigarettes or french fries are as addictive as cigarettes”, said the Uncle. “Are they going to have a patch or something for this?” the Uncle asked. “That makes you smell like biscuits that go onto your arm”, the Uncle suggested for the patch. “You are a slave to your addiction, you are not wealthy enough”, our host has learned from these studies. “All you have to do as an ‘overbese’ person is to just maintain your weight. If you just stay where you are”, said the Uncle. “If you can hold steady at your current weight, then the rest of the country is going to keep getting overweight”, the Uncle continued. “You will eventually be considered normal weight as the rest of the country gets considerately overweight”, the Uncle predicts. “I hate to use the word ‘fat’ because it’s considered politically incorrect, but these men who used to be considered overweight are no longer considered overweight”, said the Uncle. “Instead of being overweight, now it’s being relaxed fit”, he said. “The rest of the country will grow past you”, the Uncle predicts. “One day if you live long enough you will be considered normal weight”, he repeated. “I know it’s difficult to have hope, because you were programmed from birth to be ‘overbese’ ”, he said before the break for commercials. After the break for commercials and a voice message with drumbeats as bumper music, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Now we’ve got a lot more going for us than that. We’ve got Bellingrath Gardens, we’ve got the battleship, we’ve got Fort Conde, we’ve got the flea market, we have the cannon on Government Street. We’ve got a lot going for us”, said the Uncle, who was responding to a listener’s recorded message before suggesting having the Flea Market Mobile vendors for the presidential inauguration in Washington, D. C. “Maybe each one of them having each item for what they are selling out there. They could learn a lot from us in Washington, D. C. as far as I am concerned”, said the Uncle. “There is a voice mail I played earlier in the show. I rarely, if ever replay a voice mail”, the Uncle mentioned. “This voice mail could save your life if you do what you are instructed to do”, he believes. “Here is the shocking voice mail”, he said before playing the listener’s recorded message. “All right, now you need to do this, you have to have a plan. K. P., thank you for [providing] us this, the fear of getting out during a fire”, said the Uncle before mentioning some relatives. “If their stairway is blocked, they are at an age where they can break a hip if they fall two feet”, said the Uncle before suggesting a slide for their home. “Trey Lane, do you have a plan if there is a fire in the middle of the night?” the Uncle asked. “Let’s say Trey Lane is awakened in the middle of the night by his ferret”, our host supposed. “And the first thing he’s going to get is a laptop computer”, the Uncle assumed before recalling local news stories regarding laptop computers. “I just hope you have all your important information on your laptop”, said the Uncle. After mentioning fireproof safes advertised on the station, “I’ve got some fireproof safes that can hold all that kind of stuff. You see, I’m not part of the laptop generation”, said the Uncle. “K. P., excellent phone call. I would advise people to [also] get smoke detectors”, said the Uncle. “I would like to mention that Rush Limbaugh was called away from his radio show by the president of the United States”, said the Uncle. “We will get a recreation of that (lunch) from Rush Limbaugh today here on NewsRadio 710”, he said before our next caller. “Do you have any spray can or like deodorant in your home?” the caller asked. “No”, said the Uncle, who uses roll-on deodorant. “Are you saying they should remove the aerosol Axe body spray cans?” the Uncle asked. “These little cans are going to explode in two seconds”, said the caller before leaving us. “I think parents really need to explain to their children that there’s no need to [have] body spray”, said the Uncle. “If you’ve got the wealth to afford in-door plumbing, the wealth to have body soap”, the Uncle continued, you don’t need body spray. “That is anarchist, that is against social order”, he believes. Before taking a break for news, commercials, and station promotions, “They’re making it worst, they’ve come up with Axe shampoo, any other thing under that brand”, said the Uncle, that will clog my nasal passage.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Telephone number is (251) 479-2723, that’s 479-2723. The e-mail address is unclehenry@newsradio710.com, that’s unclehenry@newsradio710.com”, said the Uncle before directing listeners to an online picture “taken five or six years ago” of the show’s call screener Trey Lane. “He had a mullet haircut, which I didn’t realize until somebody pointed out to me”, said the Uncle. “I know that to some people that it’s a controversial hairstyle. Hey Trey Lane, did you see ‘American Idol’ last night?” the Uncle asked. “Once again, you can see a lot of our society by watching this show”, said the Uncle after watching the popular TV program for about 20 minutes. While describing a 21-year-old “young woman” on the program, “She had a thing on her lip that looked by a fishing hook, it looked like a fisherman got a hold of her and hooked her”, said the Uncle. “She said she got the tattoos so should would never be trapped working in an office in her life. She was worried that she would have to work in an office”, the Uncle continued. “It scares me with some of these people coming into our country these days”, said the Uncle. “Now her mother—Betty Crocker—”, said the Uncle, who said the mama of the contestant was a singer. “Working in an office is not that bad”, said the Uncle. “There is always an argument over the thermostat, whether it’s too hot or too cold”, said the Uncle, along with an argument over Axe body spray. “That one portion was very illuminating”, he said about “American Idol”. “Now my grandson, he is a few years away from that period in his life with the young people wearing tattoos”, said the Uncle. “Perhaps I’ve got a few years left and I won’t have to worry about it. The Uncle Henry Show continues in just a moment”, he said before the break for commercials. After the break and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710”, said the Uncle. “Very difficult to look at the Press-Register today because of the shocking photographs of the man’s sex tape and I apologize to all the elderly women”, said the Uncle. “I intend to never discuss that—never use that phrase again unless there’s a politician with one”, said the Uncle. “From now on I will [only] refer to it as you-know-what because there is an understanding between you and me”, said the Uncle. “A bit of cultural news and I am very sad to read this”, the Uncle announced. “You know, Stan Lee, the man who created Spider-Man and the Incredible Hulk”, he asked listeners. “The whereabouts today is that Stan Lee is creating the world’s first gay superhero”, said the Uncle. “And the secret identify”, said the Uncle, who didn’t want to give it away, but did for the character named Tommy. “And this is going to be developed for an hour-long TV drama. I don’t know what network is going to show this, the world’s first gay secret superhero. And a newspaper out in Britain is reporting this”, said the Uncle before mentioning the publication’s picture of what they think the character appears like. “They have taken Burt Ward and put a handlebar mustache on Burt Ward”, the Uncle described the picture. “I hope this show is going to be on those pay channels like Cinemax or HBO”, said the Uncle, not on CBS at 8 o’clock. “Your objection to the man on the front page is because of the crime”, our next caller asked before our host informed him. “I just want to make sure that you’re not going soft on crime”, said the caller before leaving us. “The idea that the only reason that they put it up on the front page is because it was taken from you-know-what. I am happier not knowing it came from you-know-what. The Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle before the break. After the final break for today, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710 and concludes in just a moment. At 10 o’clock we have news from FOX. After the news we have ‘Ask the Expert’ and I understand that the tree movers are going to be on there”, said the Uncle, who was never aware of the tree movers, but is interested in them. “I am tree lover, I love trees. I’m not a hugger of them”, said the Uncle. “After ‘Ask the Expert’ in the 10 o’clock hour, we have Rush Limbaugh”, the Uncle promoted. “Trey Lane has asked if we could have a roll play if we can spontaneously act if we are Rush Limbaugh and President Bush”, the Uncle mentioned. “Now if you were to ask me to roll play as a somewhat average person, that is ok with me”, said the Uncle, but if it’s a real person, “I’m putting words in their mouth”. “I would rather just hear Limbaugh discuss it (the presidential lunch) and he’s a master of description. He will paint a vivid description”, said the Uncle. “I don’t know if Mobilians are allowed to call it yet, but Michael Savage at 5:00”, said the Uncle before giving listeners a weather report courtesy of WKRG-TV5. “The National Weather Service has issued a fire weather watch”, the Uncle brought to our attention. “And the red flag warning means critical weather conditions are [in effect] now”, the Uncle continued. “So don’t use your Axe body spray”, he advised listeners. “Remember to pray, pray for others and read your Bible”, he said at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets an 8/10!

Note of Interest:

Folks, today is the 56th anniversary of WALA-TV’s first broadcast in Mobile and yesterday was the 55th anniversary of WEAR-TV’s first broadcast from Pensacola, Florida. Good day!

Today’s Show

We start off today’s show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. A beautiful, beautiful day in progress. Forty-eight degrees with mostly clear skies”, said the Uncle before reminding listeners how to contact him by telephone and electronic mail. “Those of you that are calling in right now, just let the phone ring. Trey Lane has gone to the restroom. His timing’s off on this. He should have done it during the top of the hour news”, said the Uncle. “By the way, the Azalea Trail Maids continue to be the top item on the Drudge Report this morning”, the Uncle mentioned. “Right underneath it he has a story about the inauguration where there is a law professor at George Washington University is upset about the number of port-a-potties”, said the Uncle. “He says waiting in long lines is not only an inconvenience”, the Uncle continued, but a serious health issue. “This is where we are in 2009 where you’re going to have lawyers—not just lawyers, leading professors, lining up to make sure that the porlettes (portable toilets) are (gender) neutral”, the Uncle concluded before speaking to this hour’s first caller Bill. “You’ve had some very intelligent callers that set a good example of being a good citizen”, said Bill naming frequent callers Tim (Sam Marston IV), Jim the Tax Man (or “The Tax Man”, as Bill called him), and C. J. (Citizen John). “They go to these council meetings and the other meetings”, Bill continued. “I don’t think they give a live report, they tell it like they see it”, said Bill. “What did I do that was inappropriate when he (Sam Marston IV) was talking about Big Creek Lake?” the Uncle asked Bill. “You didn’t go along with his theory”, Bill answered. “Well Bill, are you saying that I should offer apologizes with someone that I might have a minor disagreement with?” the Uncle asked. “I have to do it everyday”, Bill responded before laughing. “I don’t believe I was wrong”, said the Uncle. “He (Sam Marston IV) was imagining that you were at the flea market”, said the Uncle. “My mind was on the flea market and you and C. J. and some other callers—my mind was somewhere else”, said the Uncle, who wanted Bill to apologize. “I want to reiterate that we would love to have these concerned people like C. J. and Tim and a few others that I forget”, said Bill. “If you call up with a hypothetical situation where you’re painting a picture”, said the Uncle, who gets distracted by these mental pictures. “It makes it automatically difficult for me to talk about”, the Uncle continued. “I’m not thinking about your point, I’m thinking about the beloved caller”, said the Uncle. “So, that’s what happens when you hit me with these hypothetical situation with the callers”, said the Uncle before comparing it to fan-fiction on the Internet. While mentioning another concerned citizen, “In Mobile, Alabama, the number one person of all time who has done something like that (attend city council meetings) is the late, great Lillian Jackson”, said the Uncle before bringing to our attention a proposed amendment to the Alabama Constitution. “Now we’re all ready hearing, now we’re all ready hearing legislators that are against this”, said the Uncle. “Now why would you be discouraged of running for office?” the Uncle asked. “Now it sounds like the odds are stacking up against this”, said the Uncle, who is glad someone is proposing a way to recall elected officials in the state of Alabama. “Now that story reminds me of the late Lillian Jackson”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. After the break, “This is the Uncle Henry Show. NewsRadio 710. Telephone number is 479-2723, that’s 479-2723. The e-mail address is unclehenry@newsradio710.com. Let’s talk to Franklin. Hello Franklin”, said the Uncle. “Now this may sound controversial, but the Azalea Trail Maids are going to have to end”, said Franklin. “You know the national democratic party has always benefited with someone like poor people and minorities”, he said before mentioning “a loan for the school board” due to the City of Mobile’s annexation after reading today’s newspaper. “I think that is very inadequate. I have not heard from any group that is opposed to the annexation”, said Franklin. “Now this comes in two words, gerrymandering and greed and this creates a lifetime base of support for the mayor”, said Franklin. “I find it interesting that the city council doesn’t want to give the money to the schools after the mayor promised it”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Norman. Hello Norman”, he said to the next caller. “Yeah, it sounds like another one of the same old, same old”, said Norman in reference to the news mentioned by Franklin. “Who did that last fellow say was a democrat?” Norman asked. “(Fredrick) Richardson”, the Uncle answered. “It makes me sick, they all makes me sick”, Norman said about the Mobile city council. “Y’all ought to have a radio float with Uncle Henry riding it”, Norman suggested for Mobile’s Carnival season. “You know we’re not in a position right now to invest in floats. Maybe we should cut back on Trey Lane’s hours”, said the Uncle. “Did you watch any of the news shows last night?” Norman asked. “No”, the Uncle answered. “I was flipping through the channels”, said Norman, who noticed “ ‘Hannity and Colmes’ is no longer ‘Hannity and Colmes’ ”, as the latter host is gone. “They had this girl on there, a republican, and [then] they had Al Sharpton”, said Norman, who described the discussion as “the decline of the Bush administration”. “If you turned over to CNBC, that was the only thing they were talking about: the same thing” according to Norman. “It just makes me sick. Y’all have a good day”, he said before leaving us in anger as usual. “You’re the third sports fan today” to say something made you sick, said the Uncle. “Maybe a sponsor ship of this show from Roll Aids or Pepto-Bismal”, he suggested before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues on NewsRadio 710. (251) 479-2723 is the number, that’s 479-2723. E-mail address is unclehenry@newsradio710.com. Earlier in today’s program I talked about a news story that’s mind boggling to me”, said the Uncle. “The top recruiter of the Army says there are so many overweight applicants that they’re considering starting a military fat farm to turn ‘overbese’ recruits into soldiers”, said the Uncle. “He says we will not be able to fill up on our armed services because he says the [applicants]” are too overweight, the Uncle continued. “It will be a slim down camp, so when you want to go the Army—if you want to go into the Army and you’re ‘overbese’, they’re going to want you to go to a slim down camp”, according to the Uncle. “While they’re in the beginning stages of this, planning this out, they are not sure how much this is going to cost. Now how is this going to cost any more money?” said the Uncle. “I think it would cost less. That is really—and look for this, I’m sure we’re going to have more stories on this and I haven’t received an e-mail on this”, said the Uncle before using the electronic mailbox sound effect before revealing that actually received a message on the subject. “Everything in the military has an acronym, ‘OWS’ or overweight soldier”, said the Uncle as he read the e-mail message. “And thank you, Johnny B., for the e-mail. An actual former military member says this is problem”, said the Uncle. “I have watched a lot of ‘Gomer Pyle’ ”, the Uncle remembers. “I don’t remember any overweight soldiers on ‘Gomer Pyle’ ”, according to our host. “How times have changed”, the Uncle concluded before the next caller. “Here’s someone claiming to be Bill Meredith. Is this the real Bill Meredith?” said the Uncle before the caller spoke. “In the flesh”, Bill answered. “What is your reaction?” the Uncle asked Bill in reference to the news mentioned by Franklin. “I don’t know what the council is (doing)—I think they’re going to take it up (school budget issue) today”, said Bill. “I’m not concerned, I shouldn’t be concerned. I know two million dollars is a lot of jobs”, according to Bill. “That definitely means somebody’s job and somebody’s insurance”, Bill continued. “When you say jobs, what kind of jobs?” the Uncle asked. “Well, we get a state allocation call the foundation units”, Bill answered. “That’s [where] most of our teachers get their pay, the state allocation units”, said Bill. “There’s no other place where they can cut off jobs”, Bill continued. “It’s bad for everybody, it’s nationwide and it’s directly effecting everyone in the state”, said Bill. “I feel that the mayor’s going to come through with that measure”, Bill believes. “I don’t know how he intends to do”, Bill admitted. “You feel that you can take whatever you can get?” the Uncle asked. “I’m not going to take my pride, we’re going to do whatever we can”, said Bill. “I don’t know about annexation, I don’t know what you’re taking about there”, said Bill. “My job is to look at the best interests of the school system”, Bill continued. “I believe we can get the two million”, Bill believes. “Well, we’re punching up the school budget for 2010”, Bill mentioned. “We’re moving much money from one fund to the other fund to make sure we’re paying teachers”, Bill continued. “All right, now and again, when you say ‘cuts’, does that mean always cut jobs or you’re going to cut things that aren’t jobs?” the Uncle asked. “Well, when you get the federal money out, it doesn’t mean our local situation”, Bill responded. “Yeah, it’s going to mean jobs”, Bill continued. “It’s certainly going to mean jobs, but it’s going to be the state that’s going to allocation units”, Bill mentioned. “Now we’re late on a break. Thank you”, said the Uncle. “Have a good year!” said Bill before leaving us. “Bill Meredith of the Mobile County school board. Uncle Henry Show continues”, the Uncle reminded listeners before the break for commercials. After the break, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710”, said the Uncle. “Don’t have time to get all the e-mails I get on the air”, he informed listeners. “Some of those are posted on the Uncle Henry page at NewsRadio710.com. Not all of them”, said the Uncle. “I again urge you to bookmark that page”, he suggested. “I’ve been attacked viscously by some of the content over the past year. It’s been very intense over the holidays”, said the Uncle, who described recent content on the main page of NewsRadio710.com as that “of a sexual nature”. After getting others to monitor the main page, “I really appreciate you doing that”, said the Uncle, who used to “do that in my civilian life”. “I don’t see anything of an overtly sexual nature featured. I don’t know if this is the calm before the storm or what this may be”, said the Uncle. “I don’t see anything in the requested video list that is obscene”, said the Uncle, who noticed video of a “robo nurse”. “You can call the voice mail at (251) 706-2855, that’s 706-2855, that’s 706-BULL”, the Uncle told listeners who might have “anxiety issues”, “medical issues”, or be awake in the middle of the night. “Middle of the night voice mails are the most treasured voice mails of all”, the Uncle declared. “Some of the very best ‘Tax Man’ voice mails have come in the middle of the night, some of the most best trucker voice mails have come in the middle of the night”, said the Uncle. Due to the lengthy call with Bill Meredith, “I am now in a position where I have to satisfy the needs of the format”, said the Uncle before taking another break. After the final break for today, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. It concludes simultaneously. We have ‘Ask the Expert’ coming up in the next hour—in the next hour here on NewsRadio 710. After ‘Ask the Expert’ we have ‘The Rush Limbaugh Show’ here on NewsRadio 710”, said the Uncle, along with “The Schnitt Show”, “The Michael Savage Show”, and “The Rusty Humpries Show”. “After that we have the ‘Coast to Coast AM’ UFO show”, the Uncle continued. “So live talk all day long”, he said to listeners who might want to call Rush Limbaugh or Todd Schnitt, for example. “I don’t know if Michael Savage is accepting calls from Mobile anymore or not”, said the Uncle before giving listeners a weather report courtesy of WKRG-TV5, or “WKRG News 5”, as our host calls the station formerly known for the newscast “News Center 5”. “John Nodar says we’re going to be in the mid-20s in the middle of the night”, said the Uncle. “Remember to pray, pray for others and when you’re in doubt of what to do, read your Bible”, the Uncle reminded listeners at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 9/10!

Today’s Show

We start off today’s show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Thirty-nine degrees, a beautiful morning. (251) 479-2723 is the number, that’s 479-2723 or 479-2723 or 1-888-360-WNTM”, said the Uncle. “Are you, the listener, capable of driving on a cell phone (or ‘a hands-free cell phone’) and driving safely”, the Uncle asked before revealing why. “The United States National Safety Counsel is urging a ban on all driving with the use of hands and hands-free cell phones”, said the Uncle. “They understand and they say in their press release that it will take years to do it”, the Uncle continued. “I’m just curious—I—I know from personal experiences that they can be very distracting, but some people can’t (drive with them)”, said the Uncle. “Trey Lane, do you use your cell phone while you’re driving? Do you feel you ought to be do it?” the Uncle asked the show’s call screener, “He’s hand gesturing” “I feel that some people can’t do it”, our host believes. As for “texting”, or making a text message, “That’s got to be one of the most dangerous things people can do”, said the Uncle, who believes this is more dangerous than eating while driving. “Let’s talk to Martin. Hello Martin”, he said to this hour’s first live caller. “I agree that I think that individuals who want to show their support can contribute to the Azalea Trail Maids”, said the Uncle. “I just feel we should bombard the Mobile city council”, said Martin. “Let’s talk to Don. Hello Don”, said the Uncle. “Uncle Henry, I’ve been thinking about that NAACP and they’re reminded of the civil war. What about dreadlocks?” Don asked. “I think that the fact that the Trail Maids are a fully integrated groups says a lot about the progress of the south”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Greg. Hello Greg”, he said to the next caller. “I’d just like to ask one question”, said Greg before his question about the cellular phone research. “This is not my words, this is from the people that have done the research”, said the Uncle. “It can actually help with the passenger”, he concluded. “I guess it all depends on your passenger”, said Greg. “Are you saying having a passenger that’s not very bright is distracting in your vehicle?” the Uncle asked. “Yes”, said Greg. “Let ‘em go, let ‘em go to Washington”, Greg said about the Azalea Trail Maids. “What if you’re arguing with someone?” the Uncle asked before children came to mind as an example. “Let’s talk to Bud. Hello Bud”, he said the next caller. “On this Trail Maid thing”, said Bud before sharing his sarcastic, but ridiculous idea. “Let’s get all ages, let’s get all sexes, we can get all religions”, Bud suggested. “We’ll get Fred Richardson and give them a Moon Pie costume”, said Bud, followed by a trip to Washington, D. C. “And we’ll have a guy give them RC Cola”, Bud continued. “I think that’s a brilliant idea”, said the Uncle. “I think we can bring the whole country together, Uncle Henry”, said Bud before leaving us. “I think the first thing is to have the mayor and the city council to rename the Azalea Trail (in Mobile) the Moon Pie Trail”, said the Uncle. “We’ll change the color of the dresses to various Moon Pie flavors. We’ll have the banana dress, the orange dress, [and] the chocolate dress”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Bill. Hello Bill”, he said to the next caller, whose first words were, “Another alcohol and drug free day”, followed by our host’s applause. “Excellent!” the Uncle responded before listening to Bill share a story from a friend and police officer. After Bill left us, “So they put the powder (cocaine, or ‘coke’) in the bottle and sprayed it up their nose”, said the Uncle. “Uncle Henry Show continues”, he said before the break for commercials. After the break and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. I thought they had all ready—I thought they had all ready taken care of the coyote problem. Let’s talk to Norman. Hello Norman”, said the Uncle. “I’m not sure what you’re talking about right now, but the thing I want to talk about is that thing they put on the front page of yesterday’s paper”, said Norman. “Did you read all of that?” Norman asked. “We have not talked about that”, the Uncle responded. “That (news) is a shame and disgrace”, said Norman. “They have let him out and somebody is dead. What is wrong with that [judge]?”, said Norman, who said, “It makes me sick” as usual. “They just need to be done away with”, said Norman. “So you’re advocating the death penalty for burglary”, the Uncle wondered. “When you come into my house, you’re going to get the death penalty anyway”, said Norman. “Or perhaps a banishment from our society or a deportation”, the Uncle suggested. “Like some of the Muslim ideas”, said Norman as he suggested steel cuffs. “It makes me sick! It makes me sick! You better pray for this country”, said Norman before leaving us upset as usual. After replaying an audio clip of a caller from an unidentified radio talk show during the 1970s or 1980s, “That was a classic, that may be the only known surviving audio tape of Panama (in agreement with Norman)”, said the Uncle before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Bill, that is very disturbing, I don’t agree with that, I don’t endorse any of that. I don’t want anyone to use the show in that sort of manner”, said the Uncle in response to a listener’s voice message. “So don’t say it’s because of this show that [some] of these people have come over your house”, the Uncle concluded. “That Bill is something else”, said our next caller Chuck. “Yeah, he’s fascinating”, the Uncle responded. “I was watching CNN last night at a quarter after nine and there it is (the Azalea Trail Maids)”, said Chuck. “I don’t know if that’s good or bad. I hope it would help the Azalea Trail Maids”, said the Uncle. “I think it’s bad”, said Chuck. “Let’s talk to George. Hello George”, said the Uncle. “George T.”, George responded. “[The] president of the NAACP, I thought he said he felt offended by the Azalea Trail Maids and their antebellum dresses”, said George. “So you don’t buy it at all”, said the Uncle. “I think his logic is totally illogical. I just don’t buy it”, said George. “I think we need to all come together and forget about all of this and think about the economic situation”, said George. “You know I had a roommate once”, said George. “My roommate was a police officer”, George remembered, along with the roommate paying a ticket for him, but could not remember why he was issued a ticket. “He would remind him of the favor he did for me and I said, ‘Hey Bill, let me pay you [for the ticket for me]”, said George. “I think the Mobile police officers—we have a fine police force”, said George before leaving us. “Unusual ground cover in the last phone call. Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. After the break and a voice message, “And again, I’m distrust by this. I don’t appreciate the—these are not the people that are calling in the show doing this”, said the Uncle in response to the recorded message. “Let’s talk to Maurice. Hello Maurice”, he said to the next caller. “As an African-American, I’m embarrassed by these comments because I think the man doesn’t know anything about the Azalea Trail Maids”, said Maurice. “Uncle Henry, you have had some strange callers recently”, said Maurice before mentioning a previous caller for example. “Those living in the past want to make idiotic comments”, said Maurice. “Maurice, a longtime listener from back in the day. Probably around the time Trey Lane was born around the early 1990s when Maurice was listening to the show on another station”, said the Uncle. “Early, I was talking about the new news about ‘overbesity’ ”, said the Uncle. After reminding listeners “you can trust the government”, “For the first time ‘overbese’ outweigh overweight” people”, said the Uncle, who now wonders about underweight folks. “Someone that doesn’t weigh what the government says you should weigh”, the Uncle explained. “Researchers now claim that laughter is a very good therapy for obesity”, said the Uncle. “How can you laugh for an hour unless you have a mental problem?” the Uncle asked between reading the study. “I don’t buy this at all that laughing for an hour is equivalent to lifting weights for 18 minutes”, said the Uncle. “Trey Lane, you’re saying that’s how you stay trimmed by laughter?” the Uncle asked. “I’m going to pull you in for this because you’re going to gesture out”, he said while summoning the call screener with his theme music. “I have trouble finding things not to laugh at”, said Trey, who would laugh at “any television news program, one of the 24-hour news stations”. “So you laugh at the news”, said the Uncle. “I had to chastise my grandson. He was laughing at something tragic on the news”, said the Uncle. “I would laugh at anything”, said Trey. “All right, Trey Lane. His comments open now to analysis”, said the Uncle. “News stuff doesn’t make me laugh, Trey Lane. News [stuff] makes me mad”, said the Uncle, who also gets mad at folks reporting the news. “What do I do, I guess I’ll have to keep a DVD of Laurel and Hardy, but do I have to laugh at the same thing over and over”, said the Uncle. After the final break for today and a voice message, “Yes, I don’t like that. I’m not even going to respond to any more of these belt calls, Bill. Uncle Henry Show, we are in our concluding moments for the show today”, said the Uncle, who was responding to another recorded message by the same listener. “After this show I’m going to go into the Uncle Henry webmaster room”, said the Uncle, who will post his interview with Gina Gregory of the Mobile city council and Captain Patrick. “Also on the web page—you remember Al. In case you don’t remember Al”, said the Uncle before playing audio the banned caller explaining why “he wants everyone in Mobile to die”, according to our host. “He called in with a seven minute explanation as to why the NAACP president is correct in his hatred of the Azalea Trail Maids”, said the Uncle. “I cannot air it here because of some of the previous things Al has said about the sexual history about one of my ancestors”, said the Uncle near the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 7/10!

“Cold and Colder” – TV5 meteorologist John Nodar