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Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Today's Show




We start off today's show with…


“Well, I think you, ‘Idea Guy’—whether this works the City of Mobile needs to annex so they can do the” street project, said the Uncle in response to a listener’s voice message before reminding listeners how to call in during the show and how to contact him by electronic mail. “I’ll be looking into the e-mail box hear subsequently. Yesterday’s Mobile City Council meeting was so packed. How packed was it? They had to turn people away”, said the Uncle before specifying the fire marshal, or the “master of fire”. “According to Jessica Taloney, the always smiling lady at WKRG, dozens of people were turned away. Why should I paraphrase her? Let me share with you briefly of what she said”, said the Uncle. “Hear is the always smiling Jessica Taloney with her report on the big, packed meeting on annexation that went on and on”, he said before playing the recording from WKRG-TV5. “All right, let the people decide. Dan Murtaugh, the always controversial Dan Murtaugh was the Press-Register writer on this”, said the Uncle, who stressed the reporter’s last name twice before saying it correctly. “He writes that the meeting was filled with impassioned pleas and hurt feelings”, said the Uncle, who “not only skimmed the article, but scanned the article”. “If you had your feelings hurt at the meeting, would you please call the show”, said the Uncle. “Or if you hurt your feelings, even by accident, (251) 479-2723”, he added. “Let’s see in the story, very interesting, with all these people that signed on, Dan Murtaugh writes on a few of them”, said the Uncle. “He quotes the Reverend as saying I had the sad job of burying [over] 200 people”, said the Uncle, who interprets this quotation to mean that living outside the city limits of Mobile has been “a horrible thing” for residents. “So these people are very—that is how bad, I never realized that living in Mobile would give you hopes and dreams. I’m serious about this because I’ve lived in Mobile for decades”, said the Uncle, who might consider moving back to the city from Daphne, Alabama. “I’m going to examine all kinds of things in my life now based on this”, he declared before mentioning another newspaper article. “I can’t stop mentioning it because I find it so odd. Sunday’s Press-Register, the ‘Insight’ section, probably the most curious and odd editorial”, said the Uncle. “Look at the paragraphs of this editorial”, he said about the annexation article by the Press-Register’s editorial board. “They are saying in this editorial that if you are not included in the annexation area you are not affected. If you live a block away from the annexation area, they are saying you are not affected”, said the Uncle in spite of the taxes. “According to the Press-Register, you are not affected. Let’s talk to Jay. Hello Jay, good morning”, he said before this hour’s first caller. “Well, it looks like you said some of the things I was going to say anything”, said Jay. “Anyone that looks at how they annexed the Wal-Mart on the Schillinger’s Road (no apostrophe), one would not understand how that defies the imagination”, said Jay, who made the common mispronunciation of Schillinger Road. “Look at Old Shell Road. If this city wants to grab, it’s going to have to have major arteries east and west”, said Jay. “They are using this money to funnel their own ends for the mismanagement of the City of Mobile that it’s clear to anybody with a decent amount of common sense”, said Jay. “With Mr. (Ben) Brooks, I’m sure he’s doing everything he can”, said Jay, who believes the state senator needs to do better. “Let’s talk to Mary. Hello Mary”, said the Uncle. “The mayor wants to include everybody that is eligible to vote, but is unable to” come to the meeting downtown, said Mary. “I think he should reassess his attitude toward people. I think he’s greedy”, she said. “Why not move them into the city?” Mary asked about residents in the proposed annexation areas. “You are going to want to have the power to get into the city”, she said before leaving us. “I thank you for your phone call. Let’s talk to Steve. Hello Steve”, said the Uncle. “Isn’t it a wonderful beautiful day?” Steve asked. “We usually have one of these days before a hurricane hits”, said Steve. “We ought to be used to these storms by now”, said Steve before admitting that he “shot coffee out of my nose” after listening to frequent caller Freddie recently. “I don’t know you but I know you as a radio friend, as a radio friend I find your calls” very ignorant, said Steve. “I want you to know this about yourself, you are not very smart”, Steve continued. “It might be stubbornness”, said the Uncle. “No, he’s just not very smart”, said Steve. “Maybe Freddie is just confused. I get confused sometimes”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. After the break and a voice message, “The newspaper says we are one of the most poorest counties in the country”, said the Uncle. “You’d figure that we’d get every government grant on this place”, he said before speaking to the caller known as G-Man. “Let us take a cold hard look on what this first annexation did to my neighborhood”, said G-Man. “We were told there would be an increase in city services for the new annexation”, G-Man continued. “They forgot to tell us that it would cost the school system millions of dollars”, he said about the Mobile County Public School System. “Way to go, they really did it to us now”, said G-Man. “Your first caller said that Mobile is heading down a path similar to New Orleans. Well, we are headed down that road”, said G-Man, who might be “saving money” by not traveling to New Orleans, Louisiana. “All right, thank you for that parkway perspective”, said the Uncle before speaking to caller Paul. “We are the ones going to be suffering. We’re going to have our taxes raised”, said Paul. “Trey Lane, I’ll give you a chance—Trey Lane has been typing—even more and more [he’s] been typing about your phone calls”, said the Uncle before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“It could be worse, it could be a lot worse. I’m waiting for the government to start selling the naming rights to the hurricanes so that there can be a NyQuil hurricane”, said the Uncle in response to a ridiculous voice message regarding a tropical cyclone with a name the caller could not pronounce (“Gustavos” instead of “Gustav”) and the idea of returning to all tropical cyclones having female names because he can compare the storms to the behavior of someone opposite his gender. “You can have all these different ‘Star Wars’ names being—I’m trying to think of a ‘Star Wars’ name”, said the Uncle before recalling the character Christopher Lee played in one of the “Star Wars” movies. “Hurricane Duku, it could be worse”, said the Uncle. “Christopher Lee, one of the greatest actors in our lifetime using a light stick to fight a puppet”, he recalled before the next caller. “This is ridiculous to us, but it’s the young folks that are running this world, so we are going to have to accept it and quit complaining”, said the caller. “I know that the people in the surrounding areas, they don’t want to pay any more [hefty] taxes”, said the caller, who suggests that one fellow moves out of Mobile County. “Quit complaining”, he repeated. “More of your callers don’t even live in the area”, said the caller. “I’m paid to complain, I’m paid to talk about it”, said the Uncle. “It’s time to get off that subject and maybe, well, get onto the hurricane with the funny name”, said the caller, who was referring to the storm named “Gustav”. “That’s the way these people are in Mobile, they don’t want to change, they don’t want to move”, said the caller. “The older one of us are just going to have go along with it”, the caller continued. “With change coming, there’s going to be change”, said the caller. “Thank you very much for your phone call. I enjoyed it”, said the Uncle before speaking directly to future callers. “If you refer to me and my money, do not ever say, ‘Well Uncle Henry, you are going to have to pay a few extra pennies’. No big deal”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Grant. Hello Grant”, he said to the next caller. “Isn’t the police jurisdiction all out there in that area, including the Wal-Mart?” Grant asked. “They do pay, the police jurisdiction pays—does pay a tax to the city”, the Uncle explained to Grant. “Thank you for your call. It would be nice to see people band together, I suppose on [certain] things in society”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to C. J. Hello C. J.”, he said to the next caller, also known as Citizen John, who was laughing at the beginning of his call. “I think we could have a lot of fun with that (the naming rights idea)”, said C. J. before suggesting names for tropical cyclones such as “Hurricane ThyssenKrump” (a common mispronunciation of ThyssenKrupp, a German-based steel company with plans for Mobile County). To “expand into communist countries”, said C. J. before suggesting “Hurricane Beijing”, “Hurricane Putin”, and “Hurricane Fidel”. “Well, they would be very easy to remember”, said the Uncle. “You’ve got some very uptight callers this morning. Whatever happened to ‘Don’t Worry, Be Happy’ ”, said C. J. before suggesting that some callers send money to their congressmen. “They are doing the annexation for everybody’s own good”, said the Uncle, who may have been sarcastic about the City of Mobile. After the break for commercials and a voice message, “Well I heard all the comment about the annexation and all that talk”, said the next caller, who believes “Sam Jones wants to be the mayor of Mobile for life”. “Let’s talk to John. Hello John”, said the Uncle, whose next caller also wants to talk about annexation. “I don’t know if he has a time limit there as to when the implement the (voting) instructions”, John said about Don Davis, the Mobile County probate judge. “Trey Lane has been summoned”, said the Uncle as the show’s call screener joins him in the studio. “Summoned”, said Trey, who was asked about his whereabouts when the radio station was off the air. “I was on WKSJ yesterday from 2:00 to 7:00”, said Trey. “Wow, that is really high profile”, said the Uncle. “You shocked listeners days ago about your father’s connection to Johnny Weissmuller”, said the Uncle, whose call screener remembers a “Tarzan” TV series, if not the movies with Johnny Weissmuller as the title character. “I’ve got a voice mail on this”, said the Uncle before playing the first of two voice messages, starting with one caller’s “Tarzan impression”. “So you have no insight on how Tarzan got his loincloth?” the Uncle asked Trey. “I don’t think he did TV, I think he did movies with Cheetah”, he said about Johnny Weissmuller. “I think that was a fascinating discussion about ‘Tarzan’”, our host believes after this “insight into the life of Trey Lane”, whom he recalls mentioning his attendance at a Metallica concert as a very young child. After the final break today, “All right, Uncle Henry Show concludes. Remember to pray and read that Bible”, said the Uncle after no bumper music was used due to time constraints.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 4/10!

“Drier Days” – TV5 meteorologist John Nodar

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

On the Air




Folks, WNTM-AM came back on the air sometime this afternoon after repairs to some transmitter equipment were completed after a fire started in the radio station's transmitter building on a stormy Sunday evening. No one knows the cause of the fire as of yet. The Uncle shall return Wednesday! Good day.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Off the Air




Folks, due to technical difficulties at the radio station as a result of stormy weather, the Uncle could not have his show today. Good day!

Friday, August 22, 2008

Today's Show




We start off today's show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. I have not seen that TV commercial. I have not been seeing very much TV this week”, said the Uncle. “I have to find out about this fried chicken. I am a big fried chicken aficionado. I have been eating fried chicken every day this week, Monday through Friday”, said the Uncle, who loves to eat chicken breast. “Did some lady call in to say that Mobile is the mother of Semmes”, this hour’s first caller asked before comparing Mobile to a drunken momma on the curb. “Mobile is the mother of Semmes, I didn’t know that. Did you people in the Semmes area know that Mobile is your mother and that you shouldn’t be kicking her off on the curb?” said the Uncle. “I know a friend of mine that said his momma, she had a problem in life processing her thoughts and she was going off spending her credit cards”, the Uncle began the story. “She had everything she needed, but she had a problem with her thought process”, the Uncle continued. “It was very difficult to deal with and he eventually had a power of attorney to restrict his mother’s spending bills”, said the Uncle. “Is it possible that Semmes can have a power of attorney over Mobile because Mobile has been spending money in a maniacal fashion”, the Uncle asked. “Maybe Semmes as an adult child should have a power of attorney over momma”, the Uncle supposed. “Get someone with common sense over to Government Plaza and write a new budget”, said the Uncle, who believes “this is a shocking revelation to some people, especially the young people who are being forced to listen by an elderly person”, as he occasionally says. “Let’s talk to Freddie. Hello Freddie”, said the Uncle seconds after the “Freddie Alert System” sound effect began to blare in the background. “I had to activate the ‘Freddie alert’ again”, said the Uncle, who said he “almost lost my footing here” as the caller spoke. “My gosh! All right, (251) 479-2723, I’m going to talk to Ben first. Before I talk to Ben, I’m going to repeat my invitation to Mike Dean”, said the Uncle before seamlessly doing a live commercial for a product by Apple Computers and supported by American Telephone & Telegraph (AT&T). “I really like the iPhone 3G”, said the Uncle as he promoted the product. “Let’s talk to Ben. Hello Ben, good morning”, he said to the next caller. “I want to thank you again for being the only source of debate on this [annexation] issue”, said Ben. “Why thank you”, the Uncle responded. “I want to say the worst thing about this annexation deal is Mobile—we’re going to be badmouthing Mobile”, said Ben. “Attend more than one city council meeting because I’ve been attending those city council meetings for more than five years”, he suggested. “I think that Semmes’ got a bright future and people got to look”, said Ben before leaving us. “Semmes is facing a tax by the City of Mobile and they’re going to have taxes go up on businesses over there”, said the Uncle, as taxes will be going up anyway due to plans to incorporate as a city to keep taxes in Semmes. “I would think it would help the county attract even more businesses if he can demonstrate that we have better schools”, said the Uncle. After the break for commercials and a voice message, “Well that was uncalled for! 479-2723 is the number. In a little while I’m going to get Trey Lane’s opinion on Kid Rock”, said the Uncle, as the singer is scheduled to perform at Mobile’s annual BayFest. “Let’s talk to Billy. Hello Billy”, he said to the next caller. “All the city has to do is re-vote the three mile jurisdiction that the people didn’t want”, said Billy. “They vote to be annexed and these people can’t do anything about it”, Billy continued. “You’re absolutely right, you’re absolutely right and you know you’re right!” said the Uncle. “It’s taxation without representation”, said Billy. “Let’s talk to Liz. Hello Liz”, said the Uncle. “Hi!” said Liz. “I am Liz from the [Ronald] McDonald House and I am having an event called ‘Girls Just Want to Have Fun’ ”, said Liz. “Are men allowed?” the Uncle asked about the event at Hank Aaron Stadium in Mobile. “No boys allowed”, said Liz. “All right, no men allowed”, said the Uncle. “No boys allowed”, Liz responded before detailing the event with a $60 admission. “So it’s going to be a lot of fun, so come on out!” said Liz before leaving us. “I don’t know about the psychic readings, as I don’t believe in that stuff”, said the Uncle, but he’s sure it’s going to be a good event.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Let’s talk to Jim. Hello Jim!” said the Uncle. “Henry!” said Jim, who could barely hear our host due to some music near by. “I’m actually a little scared for my life”, said Jim. “I told you the story, I saw a lady with a nice dress pants suit”, said Jim, who later realized that this was person solicited herself. “Do you remember 20 years, Theodore was almost like Mississippi. Anything almost east of Interstate 10 was like Mississippi”, said Jim. “It’s money!” said the Uncle, who appreciated hearing Jim’s story again, as it was “one of the top 10 most dramatic moments” of his life. “Let’s talk to Steve. Hello Steve”, said the Uncle before bringing to the caller’s attention a voice message concerning him. “No, I wasn’t on ‘The (Todd) Schnitt Show’, I was on something else, I guess”, said Steve, who assumes that this recent radio talk show was “a repeat or a ‘best of’ show” before bringing up his recent hospital visit. “The great news is that I don’t have cancer”, said Steve. “Thank the Lord!” said the Uncle. “Well, he’s gone nationwide, he’s a little bit harder to get to”, Steve said about “The (Todd) Schnitt Show”. “This is ridiculous, I think by the sound of it the mayor has lost his mind. The people in Semmes [are thinking] that these people have lost their mind”, according to the next caller. “I need to get back to downtown. I need to get back to downtown Mobile”, said the Uncle before summoning call screener Trey Lane. “Who was your father close to?” the Uncle asked. “Johnny Weissmuller, I think that’s how you say his name”, said Trey. “That is amazing!” the Uncle exclaimed. “You have a distant connection to ‘Tarzan’ ”, said the Uncle before asking the call screener and professional musician if he’s performing this weekend before playing the music of Kid Rock. “Henry, Henry, Henry, Henry, that’s enough, Henry”, said Trey as the music played for several seconds. “Irrelevant and trashy”, our host repeated Trey Lane’s description. “All right, one more brief snippet of Kid Rock saying how much America sucks”, said the Uncle. “Don’t say that”, said Trey. “Well, America’s provided him with the money for the swagger, don’t you think?” the Uncle asked. “Not only is he successful, but he’s being tax payer subsidized”, said the Uncle before playing a “a brief bit” of a Kid Rock song combining “Sweet Home Alabama” and “Werewolves of London”. “I want to point out really quickly that Charlie Moss is a very big Kid Rock fan”, said Trey. “You see, Lite Mix 99.9 (WMXC-FM) has no choice to play it because it has ‘Sweet Home Alabama’ in it”, said the Uncle. “What else do you got for me today?” Trey asked. “Well, I’ve got another song by ‘Neocon Ron’ ”, said the Uncle, who might play a voice message of the listener and songwriter’s latest song using another musician’s work. After the break for commercials, “I’m A Little Bit Country and I’m A Little Bit Rock ‘N’ Roll” was used as bumper music with the Osmonds Donny and Marie singing. “Yes, you see, that’s what BayFest should get. They’re bigger than they’ve ever been”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Linda. Hello Linda”, he said to the next caller. “One of the reasons I have not moved out of my community is because my mother left us with a home”, said Linda, who wants to stay and help rebuild her area in Theodore, Alabama. “People are stuck where they are because people are not buying homes”, said Linda. “Very good, Linda, I appreciate hearing the rest of the story. All right, Trey Lane, back on”, said the Uncle before playing “Neocon Ron’s” latest composition. “This one is about the DNC (Democratic National Committee)”, said the Uncle. “All right, you’re the professional musician, what are your thoughts?” he asked the call screener, who found “Neocon Ron” smart in his choice of lyrics said to the tunes of the group AC/DC. “You can’t hope for a better review than that”, said the Uncle. “The AC/DC music, I hate it with a passion”, said the Uncle, who admits that he rarely uses the word “hate”. “Trey Lane, you have a nice weekend”, said the Uncle. “You too!” said Trey before leaving us. “AC/DC, KISS, Ludacris, Kid Rock”, our host mentioned among the folks whose music he dislikes. After the final break for today, “Now this is another person they can get for BayFest”, the Uncle said after the bumper music. “An excellent Taylor Hicks. I’m sure Taylor Hicks is a lot less expensive than Kid Rock”, according to the Uncle. “Maybe we can get great-great grandmothers”, he said about a possibly diverse BayFest crowd. “Remember to pray, pray for others and when you’re in doubt of what to do, read within the pages of your Bible”, he reminded listeners at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 5/10!

“Fay on the Way” – TV5 meteorologist John Nodar

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Today's Show




We start off today's show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. It is 9:05, five minutes after 9:00. Let’s see, every Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday I make a brief visit to 95 KSJ (WKSJ-FM)”, said the Uncle, who was referring to the radio station where he does a morning commentary before responding to a listener’s voice message. “So the idea that was hidden in that voice mail is having actual voting at the Wal-Mart”, said the Uncle. “It’s the people that are going to these Wal-Marts that are going to be taxed”, the Uncle explained. “I’m not sure, but I may be adapting your idea for use on another radio station tomorrow”, he told the caller who left the message. “And Miss Bea, I want you to be listening in the midtown area”, he told one particular listener before speaking to this hour’s first caller Bill. “It was good to hear John Singer’s voice this morning”, said Bill, who was listening to the last hour of the show. “Anyway, John’s a real good man, I think he’s raised 12 kids”, said Bill. “I never met anybody who didn’t like him”, said the Uncle. “Well that is a wonderful testimony”, he told the caller. “He’s no spring chicken anymore, but he knows law—legal law more than any attorney in the City of Mobile”, said Bill before leaving us. “Let’s talk to Neil. Hello Neil”, said the Uncle. “I want to speak to you about something that came to me the other day about a county”, said Neil, who was searching for work in this unnamed county. “They all ready found other employment because it took them so long and I looked at the website for other employment”, said Neil, who turned in 11 pages of application papers to the county revenue board. “Why in the world would it take 6 to 8 weeks to process an application and then call someone to let them know”, Neil asked, since “all the good jobs will be gone”. “I don’t know any people who could sit around for two months”, said the Uncle. “In the meantime I might find something else while I’m waiting for them”, said Neil, who wonders why his application was so long in pages. “Maybe some of our county elected officials can look into this situation and do something about it because there is no excuse to have to wait 6 to 8 weeks”, said Neil. After summoning the show’s call screener Trey Lane, “On Wednesday was when the threats of violence erupted, but it was Tuesday when you gave your political commentary”, said the Uncle as he reminded the call screener about a voice message caller’s response. “Well that man angered numerous callers including Miss Bea and [it was] George who offered to punch the guy”, said the Uncle before playing the caller’s continuation of his message for Trey Lane. “Ok, he apologized”, said the Uncle. “I don’t have anything to say about that”, said Trey. “Check out your dosages, man”, Trey suggested. “He is quite the unusual caller”, said the Uncle. “He is one of the more interesting callers”, said Trey. “I encourage him to call the show more often”, Trey continued. “There is something about his speech pattern that intrigues me”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. Suddenly during the break, “Wait, I’m interrupting a commercial, a rare—never happened”, said the Uncle. “Jerry McCutchen is coming in. It’s been confirmed!” he said about the guest host of the radio program “Ask the Expert”. “Yes, I’m interrupting the commercial, how odd it that? I may get called onto the carpet for that”, he said before allowing the advertisement to resume upon his description of it. After the commercial and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues. Telephone number is (251) 479-2723, that is the Harbor Communications hotline number, that is 479-2723 or 1-888-360-WNTM”, said the Uncle before speaking to caller George. “He’s right, I threatened to give him a punch, a tropical Hawaiian Punch”, said George. “You’re right, I’ve got a temper”, said George, who “kind of wanted him to” to misinterpret what he said in his previous call during yesterday’s show. “Let us talk to Linda. Hello Linda”, said the Uncle. “I’m a resident of Theodore and I’m excited that Sam Jones has announced [his plans] to annex us”, said Linda. “We have not been able to get any response to Mike Dean. Eight years ago he promised to pave eight of our streets”, she said. “Last year he met some of the residents of Theodore and promised to have some of our streets paved and held it off for another four years”, Linda continued. “And we are highly educated all though we are a black community”, she believes. “Let me make sure I’m understanding this, are you basically saying that the county has failed you and you are turning to the city for some help?” the Uncle asked the caller outside the City of Mobile. “He has forced us to do this. Commissioner Mike Dean has forced our anger”, said Linda. “He is responsible for this whole thing taking place”, she added. “Jump the citizens that have put you into office”, she continued. “You are the first voice in your area to speak out about this”, said the Uncle. “Thank you, Uncle Henry”, said Linda before leaving us. “You may remember that Mike Dean was criticized for always saying ‘yes’ and then Linda called in to say that she was not getting ‘yes’, so this is very interesting information we are getting on all of this”, said the Uncle before reminding listeners about today’s Gulf Coast Radio Auction to take place until 5:00 PM on his station’s website.

“Uncle Henry Show currently heard on the hobo network like the show is a month old before it makes it way down the hobo network. Let’s talk to Glenn. Hello Glenn”, said the Uncle after listening to a voice message. “A couple of weeks ago, I called in about golf carts becoming legal one day”, said Glenn, who discovered a legal golf cart on Hillcrest Road in Mobile. “So if anybody’s interested in a street legal golf cart, they are available now in Mobile”, said Glenn. “What kind of gas mileage do they get?” the Uncle asked. “I don’t know”, said Glenn, though he said most of them are electrical. “Very pretty, well made, it’s awesome”, Glenn said about golf carts. “Come on by and look at them, Uncle Henry”, he said before leaving us. “Thank you very much for the phone call, Glenn. That was very interesting”, said the Uncle before speaking to caller Tim, also known as Sam Marston IV. “His voice sounded like the rhythm of Yvonne Kennedy and the paparazzo”, Tim said comparing call screener Trey Lane to the former president of Bishop State Community College in Mobile. “That sounded almost Freddie-like”, said the Uncle, who was referring to a frequent caller known for quickly changing his subjects before acknowledging the 70th birthday of “the fantastic Kenny Rogers”. “Oh my goodness, gracious, I may not be able to listen to all of this, I might cry”, said the Uncle as a recording of the singer played in the background. “It’s very difficult to say what he looks like—what, you say he looks like Carrot Top now?” said the Uncle, who did say identify whom he was talking to. “He sure did have some fantastic hit songs in the Seventies and even in the Eighties”, said the Uncle. After the break for commercials and a ridiculous voice message, which prompted our host to say “feathers?” as it played. “You’ll be disappointed in this, listener”, said the Uncle. “I don’t have time for Bigfoot. You say it was a suit with feathers on it?” the Uncle asked the caller who left the voice message. “Listen, I appreciate you continuing to leave your finger on the pulse of Mobile and Baldwin County”, said our next caller Tony, who lives in West Mobile, but knows of no annexation issues in the county east of Mobile Bay. “Thank you very much for the phone call, Tony. Tony full of energy there”, said the Uncle, who doesn’t believe Mike Dean is avoiding the show. “He carried his area quite well. He did quite [well] in the republican primary”, said the Uncle before the next caller. After that caller, “Let’s talk to Bobby. Hello Bobby”, said the Uncle. “I used to listen to you quite a bit”, said Bobby, who was surprised by our host interrupting a commercial earlier and said what he was thinking at the time. “You don’t know about the special guest today either?” Bobby asked regarding “Ask the Expert” with guest host Jerry McCutchen. After Bobby left us, “That was an excellent call with scientific bent. It’s like being in class, you should be a teacher”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Charlene. Hello Charlene”, he said. “The thing that I object to is the way the mayor and the council have undermined—have gone and undermined” what’s going on in Semmes, Alabama, said Charlene. “We are what we are and if you choose what we are, then that makes you what you are”, Charlene continued. “The only thing Mayor Jones’ interested in is forming this big metropolis”, Charlene believes. “What we don’t want is for someone like the City of Mobile to come on in here and tell us what to do”, she said. “We’re going to fight this, we are not going to lay down and take it”, she said before leaving us. “Thank you very much for the phone call. Very good”, said the Uncle. “It’s very fascinating to me”, he said after receiving both sides of the annexation issue. After summoning call screener Trey Lane again, our host asked him when his next performance is taking place. “This Halloween”, Trey answered. “What about your group Seduction Bomb? Have you broken up?” the Uncle asked before learning that they are working on their second recording. “The news is next, remember to pray, pray for others and read that Bible”, the Uncle reminded listeners at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 7/10!

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Today's Show




We start off today's show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. It is 9:05, five minutes after 9:00. The Harbor Communications hotline number so you can get in touch with me is (251) 479-2723”, said the Uncle. “If you want more information on the annexation battle, you can look at the City of Mobile’s power point presentation on the Uncle Henry page at NewsRadio710.com”, he told interested listeners. “If you missed the last part of the last half-hour, you have missed interesting information as Jim Barton called in” about local officials who were upset, said the Uncle. “Mike Dean very upset about the way things have been handled”, the Uncle mentioned. “If you’re going to do something like this, then you have the entire police jurisdiction vote on [something like] this”, he explained one suggestion. “And y’all said Ken Megginson was there last night at the meeting”, said the Uncle, as the school board member was very upset about the money lost by the Mobile County Public School System. After losing one caller, “Lost Al and it was purple (the button)!” the Uncle told the show’s call screener Trey Lane. “A lot of the people that live right by these businesses have to pay higher taxes and they are not allowed to have their say”, said the Uncle. “All right, let me try again on purple. All right, I’m clicking purple”, he said before this hour’s first caller spoke. “Are you saying they are having drug problems in London with people killing each other?” the Uncle asked Al before asking if they use knives. “It’s a very neat situation over there and I just came back from over there”, said Al. “I have never heard that they had drug wars in London”, said the Uncle. “It’s just the common people, it’s not a wealthy area”, said Al before mentioning that “it’s all Muslims”. “I don’t know anything about it, especially the demographic break down of these drug wars”, said the Uncle before speaking to caller Bill. “Unfortunately I’m living in Decatur, Alabama and I don’t get to listen to you that much”, said Bill. “I’d just like for them (the Alabama Legislature) to meet just once every four years and that way they can get on my nerves only half the time”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Al. Hello there, Al”, he said to another caller named Al. “We love your show and on this annexation thing, out in Tillman’s Corner we have a Wal-Mart and Sam Jones wants that too”, said Al, who may have said, “Hell no”, but his voice was barely understandable. After the second Al left us, “Thank you for the phone call!” said the Uncle. “People are very passionate about this”, he said about folks such as the previous Al. “Let’s talk to Chuck”, he said before the next caller spoke. “I was just going to ask a question about this. Why in the Sam Hill would you go” and put an injunction on the City of Mobile from annexing land, Chuck asked. “You have a lot of these judges that used to be attorneys for the City of Mobile”, said the Uncle. “When it comes to annexation, that is a time sensitive thing that you want to get done as soon as you can”, the Uncle continued. “I agree with you, Chuck”, he said, “it should not happen so quickly”. “If everything is above board here, why the rush?” our host asked before the break for commercials. After the break, “Uncle Henry Show, the Uncle Henry Show continues on a beautiful Wednesday”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Carl. Hello Carl”, he said to the next caller. “How are you doing, today?” Carl asked before sharing his conversation with Jim Barton. “Most of these—I’m not going to say all, but I don’t call them all, but most of them call whenever a reasonable time”, said the Uncle before summoning call screener Trey Lane with his theme music. “Getting Trey Lane to speak out (about politics yesterday) really rubbed someone the wrong way”, said the Uncle before playing a listener’s rude voice message seamlessly. “All right, Trey Lane, that guy was upset with you”, said the Uncle. “Well he was on the sauce”, Trey responded. “I don’t have a fan base at all”, Trey said after our host asked him about his “twerp fan base”. “I don’t know any twerps”, said the Uncle, who doesn’t think at that word very much. “You made it clear yesterday you are not in favor of either (presidential) candidate”, said the Uncle. “Politically ignorant, that’s me”, said Trey. “A few phone calls placed here you can have all kinds of law enforcement rush in with Trey Lane and his twerp fan base”, said the Uncle before making assumptions about the “twerps”. “It’s 90 degrees and they have long pants and they have long hair like it’s the 1970s when it’s the year 2000-whatever it is”, said the Uncle. “I guess I’m not suppose to—maybe they are twerps”, he said. “We heard weeks ago that they (in Denver, Colorado) are planning to give all the homeless people free movie tickets”, said the Uncle, who has now “received word that they are offering the homeless free haircuts”. “I can’t imagine that a lot of these businesses would appreciate this influx of the homeless”, said the Uncle, who read an estimate of 4000 homeless folks. “This is just—this obsession with the way Denver looks, I don’t think Denver would make a bad impression”, said the Uncle. “Clear Channel sent me out to a talk show school once, the one that is in Denver, it’s very nice and I didn’t see any of this once that the international media’s going to see”, said the Uncle. “If you are confused about the City of Mobile’s annexation plan, I have the power points presentation”, he reminded listeners. “All available right now on the Uncle Henry page at NewsRadio710.com if you are curious about it”, said the Uncle before giving listeners a short weather report courtesy of WKRG-TV5, including an update on a tropical cyclone named “Fay”. “John Nodar says about this storm we are not sure. The computer models are all over the map”, said the Uncle. “We could see some heavy rain from late Sunday to early Monday”, the Uncle continued, “but not all of that is set in stone because the storm [had] some very unusual movements”. “News time is 9:30”, he said before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. I never wear any overalls while I’m getting the newspaper”, said the Uncle, who also mentioned to the caller in the voice message that he is “not a robe person”. “Right before the break, you were talking about Denver and the homeless people”, said our next caller John, who was “in the construction people and I was working on an apartment complex in Fairhope” where some “hobos” came over. After hearing their story about traveling and jumping on trains, “That really interested me”, said John, who asked them if there are “any places better than the other one” they left. “So they want them out in Denver, they don’t [want] any of these freebies out there”, said John. “John, I want to thank you. This is one of the most interesting calls I’ve received in several weeks”, said the Uncle. “How do you like that?” the Uncle asked his audience, “The hobo network”. “That was almost like watching a movie by listening to that call. Let’s talk to George. Hello George”, said the Uncle. “I was really enjoying your show until that person who was very repugnant about Trey Lane”, said George, who never “heard the man before and I don’t know his outlook” on Trey Lane. “I can take care of that guy, he’s a lightweight”, said George, who hated to say that he could punch him. “Trey Lane, I couldn’t read your lips”, said the Uncle after the call screener re-entered the studio. “People have developed a fondness for you”, said the Uncle after hearing caller George “rush to your defense”. Before playing the first few seconds of another negative voice message for Trey Lane, “It was by accident, I almost played”, said the Uncle. “With a (homeless) population they estimate for 4000, they must all ready be doing something”, he told the next caller about Denver. “You wouldn’t think they have a large population without trouble”, he said before the break for commercials. After the break and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues [here] on NewsRadio 710. A lovely Wednesday morning. Let’s talk to John. Hello John”, said the Uncle. “You’d see her twice a year. I haven’t seen her in a while”, said John before asking our host if he’s seen a newspaper article about a lady who forced a burglar to dial 911. “I thought that was great, she should have put a few holes in him”, said John, who suggested that the lady should have shot the burglar. “Let’s talk to another John”, said the Uncle. “I’m reminded about another lady”, said this hour’s third John, who remembers the story of a lady who “held a guy by his testicles” before police arrived after her 911 call. “I’m just amazed by how many people call your voice mail at 3:00 AM. What do they do, sit around at a bar”, said John. “Here’s a voice mail since John mentioned it”, said the Uncle. After playing the recorded message recorded overnight, “All right, sir, and I do appreciate you calling, but I don’t understand what that was about, though. Let’s talk to Tim. Hello Tim”, said the Uncle before the caller known to others as Sam Marston IV spoke. “Thinking about the lawsuit on the previous annexation attempt, I think those people almost ran out of money at one point”, said Tim, who doesn’t remember any annexation meetings similar to the one last night in Semmes, Alabama. “Hats off to the Semmes community”, Tim mentioned. “They were all ready organized before this ever became an issue”, said the Uncle. “I thought Mike Dow drew those first lines out there and then came the lawsuit”, said Tim, who was speaking about Mobile’s former mayor “They keep adding this (issue) on to certain councilmen”, according to Tim. After the final break for today and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues. Let’s talk to Tom. Hello Tom”, said the Uncle. “Do you think I’ll get your advice on how we can de-annex”, said Tom, who wants his road repaved. “I guess they’re going to promise more [and] we never get anything”, said Tom. “If they can live another 40 years, the ‘String of Pearls’ will pay off”, said the Uncle before reminding listeners how to leave a voice message on his answering machine. “You can go to the voice mail if you have an urgent comment you must make”, said the Uncle. “You can go to my page without getting permission from the city” to see the power points presentation, he reminded listeners. “Again, weather today a lot like yesterday”, he continued with the reminders. “Just watch the ‘Fay’, he reminded listeners about the tropical cyclone. “They (weather forecasters) don’t really know, so they’re advising us to watch ‘Fay’ ”, the Uncle added. “Remember to pray, pray for others and when you’re in doubt of what to do, read within the pages of your Bible. Thank you for listening”, he said at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 6/10!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Today's Show




We start off today's show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Phone lines are open, the Harbor Communications hotline is (251) 479-2723, that’s 479-2723, or 479-2723 or call in toll-free at 1-888-360-WNTM. We have talked a lot about annexation all ready this morning. We have that meeting tonight at Montgomery [High School]”, said the Uncle. “You can read more about that at SaveSemmes.com. That’s SaveSemmes.com. There’s something that struck me as odd in today’s newspaper. We have a Big Foot expert that lives in Mobile”, said the Uncle. “I’m don’t mean this as a slight at Big Foot, but I just don’t believe in Big Foot”, he admitted. “What do you think the odds are that he’s a NewsRadio 710 listener? I am sure that the Big Foot expert is a NewsRadio 710 listener”, said the Uncle, since his radio station has the overnight program “Coast to Coast AM”. “I’ll say this, I am more likely to believe in Big Foot than I do UFOs”, the Uncle concluded before speaking to this hour’s first caller Larry. “I want to make the comment about the removal of so-called nuisance alligators”, said Larry. “Just a way for all these bubbas to come over the delta (Mobile-Tensaw Delta) and kill things”, according to Larry. “From what I’ve been led to believe, there is an overpopulation of alligators in the delta”, said the Uncle. “I don’t get it”, said Larry. “You and I are diametrically opposed”, said the Uncle, who believes some listeners may remember that he’s against alligators. “We don’t know, that alligator might vacation on the Causeway and eat people”, said the Uncle, who “doesn’t want to get dragged”. “I hung up on someone?” the Uncle asked, “Trey Lane said I made some blunder”. “I prefer my alligators in Florida. Let’s talk to Bill. Hello Bill”, he said to the next caller. “I used to kill an alligator”, said Bill. “I don’t think Semmes wants another city—municipality out there because if they really want to get it where are they going to put the waste treatment plant out there?” said Bill. “People out in the country are different from the people out in the city. They moved out there for a reason”, Bill continued. “They’ve got a good sheriff’s department that seems to protect everyone”, according to Bill. “They just want to be left alone and tell Sam Jones (mayor of Mobile) to carry his own problems”, he said before leaving us. “Many of them did not want to incorporate but wanted to do this in self defense”, said the Uncle, and “keep their tax dollars right in Semmes”. “I want to engage you in a debate on Big Foot versus the UFO”, said our next caller. “They’re finding planets all the time, Uncle Henry, you know that?” the caller asked. “If there’s water (on Mars) there’s likely to be Big Foot on another planet”, said the caller, who finds that “more interesting” than annexing Semmes, Alabama into the City of Mobile. “Are you the Big Foot expert in the paper”, the Uncle asked the caller. “He hung up”, said the Uncle before reminding his last caller that “in a debate you have to have two people”. “Don’t bring the UFOs to me because I’m just not a believer”, he said before speaking to caller Mary. “I don’t remember or recall that Mr. Jones was vocal and active as county commissioner for 10 or 12 years”, said Mary, who heard someone say the mayor wants the annexations to make Mobile larger than Birmingham. “That may be probably what he’s driving for”, according to Mary, who doesn’t believe the mayor ever talked about Prichard or Saraland, Alabama when he was county commissioner, since her daughter used to live outside the Mobile city limits. “Thank you, Mary, you calmed me down about the idea of being a county person and living out in the country”, said the Uncle. “Looks like we had a call come in from an outside area code. Well I didn’t touch anything, I didn’t click on anything”, said the Uncle. “I don’t know why in this hour, but we have these discussions”, he said in reference to what Trey Lane says off the air. “I’m not only going to hold, but bite my tongue and hold Trey Lane during the commercial breaks”, he said before the break for commercials. After the break and a voice message, “I don’t understand the question, of course, of course it’s a word (‘caint’)”, said the Uncle in response to the recorded message before reminding listeners how to contact him by electronic mail. “Yeah, that’s a word if you can understand the saying. They are just trying to communicate with you, that’s all”, the Uncle explained. “Even though that [doesn’t] translate to anything you can spell, that is a word”, he concluded before summoning call screener Trey Lane with his theme music “as a public service to Miss Bea because she loves the sound of your voice”. As a suggestion for registered voters of two large political parties, “You don’t give them (public servants) your number or your address unless you are willing to be contacted by them for the rest of your life asking for money”, our host told the call screener in a presidential campaign discussion. “All right, Trey Lane is the one that said it here on this August 19th, 2008, Miss Bea: Trey Lane making a rare comment on politics”, said the Uncle. Instead of “spouting out at the mouth” like other radio disc jockeys, “Trey keeps himself with his laptop. I don’t know what he’s doing with it”, said the Uncle before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Telephone lines is open at 479-2723, that’s the Harbor Communications hotline”, said the Uncle. “E-mail address is unclehenry@newsradio710, that’s unclehenry@newsradio710.com and I—what do you call them, ‘Theodorians’ or what you may call them ‘Theodorans’ ”, said the Uncle, who was referring to residents of Theodore, Alabama. “I don’t know if there’s any civic group in Tillman’s Corner or Theodore that is as fired up as the group in Semmes”, our host admitted. “I’m going to provide a link to all the information I can find on this, but I know that the city (Mobile) has not provided any information”, said the Uncle. “I’m looking forward to if the City of Mobile has any information on this” to have both sides of the issue, the Uncle continued. “We’ve had only one pro annexation call, so I kind of like to have another pro annexation caller or two just to have them offer a counter balance of why they want to come into the City of Mobile”, the Uncle concluded. “Let’s talk to Tim. Hello Tim”, he said to the frequent caller also known as Sam Marston IV. “You’ve got this girl that took a picture of you at BayBears park (Hank Aaron Stadium to be exact), I think I know her”, said Tim, who remembers her as “a very nice lady”. “Does she know you?” the Uncle asked Tim. “I don’t know”, Tim answered. “Did you go to school with her?” the Uncle asked. “Yes”, Tim answered. “Well good for you”, the Uncle responded. “I remember a special in the (Mobile Press) Register which I think Rusty Glover wrote about the Semmes intersection”, said Tim, who can only remember “that they took that pig out of the annex area” and doesn’t know what happened to the pig. “I understand what you said about (Kenny) Stabler, you absolutely cannot be impartial when your buddies are (in it)”, Tim said about the court case of a former Alabama Crimson Tide football quarterback and broadcaster for the University of Alabama. “Thank you very much, Tim”, said the Uncle before adding the possibility of family involved in a court case. “The Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710”, he said before the break for commercials. After the break, music from the TV program “The Dating Game” was used as bumper music as a voice message played. “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710”, said the Uncle before responding to the recorded message. “I’ve just never been a hugger and you can read into that what you will, Bill, maybe—maybe you can take me to one of your group therapy sessions”, said the Uncle before speaking to caller Thomas. “The gentleman worrying about them (Semmes, Alabama residents) becoming more like Wilmer”, said Thomas before sharing his daily experience with patrol officers. “I didn’t know that, is it—is it heavily patrolled out there in Semmes all ready?” the Uncle asked. “Thank you for letting me know that. I didn’t know that”, said the Uncle. “You just didn’t have what you have now. Right now, it’s more like a metropolis out there”, said the Uncle, who used to visit the area and remembers seeing tractors. After the next caller left us, “We’ll all have that mental image of you cutting your hay”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Billy. Hello Billy”, he said before the caller spoke to supporters of the annexation plan. “Think of someone else besides yourself when you vote on that annexation”, Billy suggested. “But do you know about the 4000 plus city codes that you’ll get once you get a permit?” Billy asked. “You can pull all these 4000 plus laws on your neighbors”, said Billy, who believes “you are taking away their right within a three mile jurisdiction” if they support the annexation. After Billy left us, “I had no idea that you cannot kill a snake in the City of Mobile”, said the Uncle, who might consider himself “a law breaker”. “I would kill anything that would slitter on my property”, he said before the break. After the break and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710”, said the Uncle. “I never even thought about the ramifications about the sportsmen on the annexation”, said the Uncle after listening to previous caller Billy. “Can we afford to take away a food source from some people with the way things have been going with the gas prices”, the Uncle asked with concern for folks that eat squirrels. “Can they allow them to eat whatever is on their property”, the Uncle continued. “So you should think about the ramifications on your poor in this economy. They are going to be going up on the taxes”, he reminded listeners. “This is something you should be thinking about when it comes to a land grab”, he suggested before reminding listeners about tonight’s meeting in Semmes and the website SaveSemmes.com. “All ready they made their feelings perfectly clear when you go to their website”, the Uncle mentioned. “We are out of time for today’s show, thank you for listening”, he told his audience before promoting today’s edition of the radio program “Ask the Expert” with host Charlie Moss and an expert from Head’s Heating and Air. While giving listeners a short weather report courtesy of WKRG-TV5 meteorologist John Nodar, “Hits and misses, better than a 50/50 chance”, our host said about the chance for rain. “Remember to pray, pray for others and when you’re in doubt of what do, read within the pages of your Bible. Just spend a little time reading it in the morning”, said the Uncle at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 9/10!

“Fay Stays Away” – TV5 meteorologist John Nodar

Monday, August 18, 2008

Today's Show




We start off today's show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. A splendid Monday, a wonderful, wonderful Monday. The Harbor Communications hotline is open”, said the Uncle after playing a very unpleasant voice message from a listener of the show. “Last hour, many impassioned calls about annexation”, said the Uncle. “Very passionate issue”, he now believes. “What is it, three weeks from the vote? It’s going to be a swift—it’s going to be a fast few weeks”, said the Uncle. “Trey Lane, are you reading me?” he asked the show’s call screener, whose theme music was played. “I want to tell you you were missed at the AT&T Store”, said the Uncle, who was “unable to broadcast for the two hours we were scheduled to be there” due to rainy weather on Sunday, but the call screener didn’t have to come for the promotion. “It was very nice to see Crockett, very nicely dressed”, said the Uncle, who also met a caller named Lulu. “Just as we were leaving, Trey Lane, Miss Bea arrived”, said the Uncle. “Miss Bea is a 91-year-old lady who moved to Mobile during World War II to become an aircraft technician”, said the Uncle, who mentioned the caller’s later occupations at places such as the police department. “She said she is in love with you and she really loves your voice”, said the Uncle. “Get out of town!” Trey responded in surprise. “She knows all about you”, said the Uncle before mentioning that the listener wants to know more about Trey Lane. “I would love to meet Miss Bea, we’ll see about that”, said Trey. “I want to get your professional opinion as a professional musician and solo artist and member of the group Seduction Bomb”, said the Uncle as usual before playing a new song by the listener, frequent caller, and songwriter Crockett. “All right, that was part one. I want to give my opinion before you give yours”, said the Uncle, who believes the inclusion of Hall’s Meats in the song “gets an A+ for the mention of the sponsor”, something Trey Lane agreed with before part two of the song was played. “All right, now, Trey Lane, your thoughts as a professional musician on Crockett’s composition”, said the Uncle. “Any other reviewing, any other comments, criticism?” he asked. “I would say that’s in the top 10 of Crockett’s performances”, said Trey. “Thank you for your input on that as a professional musician”, said the Uncle. “Perhaps Lulu will come out for that”, he said about the rescheduled AT&T Store promotion. After listening to Crockett’s song, “I have not been able to whistle as well as others”, said the Uncle, who assumed he has a “lip deficiency”. “Let’s talk to Bubba”, he said to the first caller this hour. “If we’re going to that (annex Tillman’s Corner, Theodore, and Semmes into the City of Mobile), we might as well elect Fidel (pronounced FI-DEL) Castro as president”, Bubba said about what he calls a “land grab”. After the break for commercials and a voice message, “Well I—how can you be sure, how can you be sure the pants were designed just a men if a woman is wearing them?” the Uncle asked the caller who left the recorded message. “You said you have to take a narcotic to take care of a headache? Is that something people do”, our host asked. “I’ll be looking in the e-mail in just a little while to see what’s popped up”, said the Uncle before bringing to our attention some audio of a report from WKRG-TV5, or “WKRG News 5” as he, a self-proclaimed “company man”, prefers to call them. “It was when Steve Alexander, the very serious, the appropriately serious” reporter who spoke to visitors at a Wal-Mart store in Semmes, Alabama, said the Uncle. “If I were Channel 5 or Channel 10 or Channel 15 I would set up a permanent booth at a Wal-Mart”, said the Uncle, who suggested having a camera at such a booth. “You’re going to get better comments, you’re going to get the truth”, he believes. After playing the audio, “All right, it’s working out, see the annexation is working out good!” said the Uncle before replaying audio of the lady saying, “It’s working out good!” for his own enjoyment. “All right, we have just come out of a commercial break” our host said all of a sudden after no commercial break took place. He explained that he will be “discussing vital station information. Never before has the show been interrupted (like this)”. As the off air discussion went on, listeners heard a musical interlude that consisted only of the first few notes and lyrics of “I’m A Little Bit Country and I’m A Little Bit Rock ‘N’ Roll”, in which only the words “I’m a little bit” by Marie Osmond were heard on the air. “All right the conference is over. Thank you for your indulgence. You say, ‘Well Uncle Henry, what could be so important?’ said the Uncle, who played the role of the listener while under the assumption that his listeners asked that question. “Now the album won’t stop playing! All right, Franklin is here to restore order on this show”, said the Uncle before the caller spoke. “All right, I don’t know anything about the racial component[s] in Semmes”, said the Uncle, who said Franklin was the first caller to bring it up. “I think it’s working out good! That lady said in the Wal-Mart parking lot has just been annexed into the city”, said the Uncle before playing the audio clip of the lady again. “So your fear of annexation—we have at least one witness to the process”, said the Uncle before playing the audio yet again. “News is next, a reminder that we have at NewsRadio710.com the new Gulf Coast Radio Auction”, said the Uncle before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues. (251) 479-2723 is the Harbor Communications hotline number. Let’s talk to Nelson. Hello Nelson”, said the Uncle. “I live in the Theodore-Tillman’s Corner area and I heard that guy”, said Nelson, who was referring to previous caller Franklin. “It had nothing to do with black or white, it has to do with green”, said Nelson before explaining why he was for annexation until the latest annexation plans were revealed by Sam Jones, the mayor of Mobile. “I was hoping that it would bring, you know, some guidelines and rules for it, but the way he has it drawn up for Semmes”, said Nelson. “That’s all that it looks, a money grab”, according to Nelson. “It’s all about the revenue and not about the people so they need to keep that in mind before the votes”, Nelson continued. “I’m for progress”, said Nelson, “but I want my neighbors to be part of that progress”. “So my view has changed”, he said before leaving us. “I have to agree with that caller”, our next caller Frank said about Nelson before sharing his wish for the lady in the audio clip. “I wish she was shopping on Moffett Road in Tillman’s Corner, where the sales tax is cheaper”, said Frank. “You are absolutely right”, the Uncle responded. “Roll Tide, Unc!” said our next caller Jim, who made the common claim that the previous caller “stole my thunder”. “I was curious about what that old lady had to say about the newly annexed area”, Jim explained. “The residents that are still living out here are not getting any additional services out of it and are paying more taxes”, said Jim. “All right, thank you, Jim, it was nice hearing about that. Let’s talk to another Jim. Hello Jim”, said the Uncle before the caller shared his experience with call screener Trey Lane. “He’s not like me and is ready to seize the beginning of the week”, according to the Uncle. “Well, if you don’t live in one of those areas (proposed for annexation)—it doesn’t really matter what we think about this—it’s up to the people who live [out] there”, said the Uncle. “We’ve got to stop Napoleon (Jones)”, said Jim. “It is clearly a situation where the City of Mobile is terribly” out of money, said the Uncle. Before taking a break for commercials, “More of your phone calls. Also a chat with Trey Lane about his teeth is coming up”, said the Uncle. “All right, better talk about Trey Lane and his experiences at Spring Hill Dental”, said the Uncle during a live commercial for Dr. Byron Scott’s dental services in Mobile. “I am asking about this because Miss Bea was very interested about this”, he explained before the call screener mentioned the timetable for more dental work this week. “Now what has this done for you, the whole makeover of the mouth?” the Uncle asked. “Physical changes also brings changes to the mind”, according to our host. “Absolutely”, Trey responded. After the break, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710”, said the Uncle before speaking to caller Mary. “How come they don’t let the property owners vote”, Mary asked. “They’ll be taxing you and you don’t have no vote”, said the Uncle. “Well, Mary has real property”, he said before speaking to caller Bill. “I tried to get ten acres (of grass) done and I had this terrible headache”, said Bill before our host mentioned the compact disc Crockett wanted to give to Bill yesterday at the AT&T Store promotion. “I don’t know why I was thinking he brought me a scarf”, said Bill before our host assumed “it was the narcotic headache medicine” that got him thinking about a scarf. After Bill left us, there was silence for a few seconds until another musical interlude, but which was instrumental bumper music used after the last commercial break. “All right, Uncle Henry Show returns here”, said the Uncle after a technical problem was resolved. “Let’s talk to Mike. Hello Mike”, he said to the next caller. “Every time that happens, I think the copper thieves got to you again”, said Mike. “It was not copper thieves”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Pete. Hello there, Pete, good morning”, he said to the next caller. “Hello there, I’m a new listener”, said Pete. “Have you ever seen Rose Ann Havens (no “S”) on TV?” Pete asked our host, who has indeed seen the WKRG-TV5 news presenter. “Have you ever [seen] her mouth looked funny?” Pete asked, causing our host to be speechless before laughing. “And I refuse to look and I’m not going to pay special attention to it. I’m perplexed by it”, said the Uncle, who suggests that Pete sends “an e-mail to Channel 5 about this”, as he could only wish there was another radio show that would accept such a question. After the break and an angry voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. I have given up on Oprah (Winfrey), I gave up on her getting involved in all these—these very weird beliefs where she’s giving all these—these all spiritual books”, said the Uncle. “She’s trying to make her audience remember all these past lives, I was very offended by this”, the Uncle continued. All though our host believes she had good intentions, the talk show host “just seems very open to all these weird concepts”, said the Uncle. “So Dan, just alert me the next time there’s a future show of interest”, he said to the listener who left the last recorded message. “I want to go back to the ‘podcast’ and try to dissect what has happened”, said the Uncle after a “very unusual fourth hour” of the show. “Perhaps it was untimely the interruption—the interruption by management”, said the Uncle. “Perhaps I’ll lock the door”, he suggested for preventing such interruptions, but considered the possibility of a medical emergency. If there is no key, “They’ll probably call a corporate meeting to decide whether to break the glass”, said the Uncle, who believes he would dead by the end of such a meeting. “Please don’t ask me any questions about people’s bodies”, he told listeners and future callers before reminding all to pray and “read within the pages of your Bible”. “News time is 10 o’clock”, he said at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 7/10!

Friday, August 15, 2008

Today's Show




We start off today's show with…


"My Love is Mobile" ("that's my wonderful town"), the show’s unofficial theme song that was interrupted with all-time caller Leroy’s “Roll Tide Roll” shout. After some bumper music, “Uncle Henry Show continues. What a beautiful day. The interaction continues as well. The Harbor Communications number is (251) 479-2723, that’s 479-2723, or 1-888-360-WNTM”, said the Uncle. “We have numerous things to talk about here on the Uncle Henry Show. We have talked about the annexation attempt”, he said before speaking to the first caller this hour. “Hello, Mr. Henry”, said Ricky, who asked, “Where can you actually see this map at?” before our host mentioned the newspaper. “What is a homeowner due?” Ricky asked after listening to the show’s previous hour. “When they become a part of the City of Mobile, there will be a five year moratorium, but after that”, said the Uncle, taxes will be passed on. “That lady made it clear that they approached the city on their own and they want to be part of the city”, said the Uncle. “Yes, the Winn-Dixie is part of it”, he confirmed for Ricky in addition to the store being “a happy thing” for the City of Mobile. “All right, Ricky. Well, you heard the lady. You see, I don’t doubt her and there’s the other place called Windmill Place which doesn’t have any notable places”, said the Uncle before mentioning the areas of Theodore and Tillman’s Corner. “One of the most interesting bits of map drawing reaches out to Schillinger (Road) and Montlimar (Drive)”, said the Uncle. “When I make purchases, I drive from where I live (Daphne, Alabama) to the Fairhope Wal-Mart”, said the Uncle. “I guess it’s selfish of me to really save any money on taxes”, our host supposed. “Maybe I’m being unfair to Daphne by not going into that Wal-Mart more often by paying additional taxes”, he said before speaking to caller G-Man. “I spent some time last night thinking what the annexation means for us”, said G-Man, who was speaking about current residents of the City of Mobile. “It’s suppose to make you stronger”, said the Uncle. “So, what all this means is the ‘String of Pearls’ plan (for redeveloping downtown Mobile) is a abject failure because ‘The String of Pearls’ was suppose to fix everything”, said G-Man. “All right, G-Man, thank you for your perspective. Is it really fair to judge ‘The String of Pearls’ until another lifetime?” said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Nick. Hello Nick”, he said to the next caller. “Thank you very much for your analysis there. (251) 479-2723 is the number”, said the Uncle after Nick left us. “I’m going to be at the AT&T (store) on the Beltline”, our host reminded some listeners. “Just try to imagine that visually in your head”, he said about the location. “I’m going to have some medical equipment that I’m going to be hooked up to intermittently”, he told listeners in advance. “I love it at the AT&T where they have something for you to check up on your children”, said the Uncle as he seamlessly does a promotion for AT&T within the show. “Looking forward to seeing you and the broadcast I’ll be doing (this weekend) will be during at NASCAR competition on NewsRadio 710. Let’s talk to Robert. Hello Robert”, said the Uncle. “I take it might be like the former Soviet Union”, said Robert, who compared Mobile’s annexation plans to the country formerly known as the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics (USSR). “Sooner or later Mobile is just going to have to go ahead and annex the [entire] state”, according to Robert. “I shop up there at the Tillman’s Corner Wal-Mart”, said Robert, who “doesn’t want to stand in line for food” due to higher taxes. “The whole system is corrupt and if anybody in Theodore wants to go ahead and be annexed, then they are politically naïve”, Robert concluded his call before the break for commercials. After the break, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Let’s talk to—let’s see, we have Steve. Hello Steve”, said the Uncle. “I’ve got another new recipe for you guys if you’ve got time”, said Steve. “Yes!” said the Uncle. “This is my take on an Alfredo sauce. I’ve been told that it’s very, very good”, said Steve before describing the recipe. “Don’t get the pre-graded craft, you’ve got to work for this recipe”, Steve continued. “Don’t add margarine, don’t try to make this healthy for you”, said Steve, who added the suggestion of not “eating this all the time”, as the food is very fattening. “I understand that Alfredo [sauce] is suppose to do that”, said the Uncle. “Thank you for your phone call and I appreciate the recipe. You have stimulated the interest of Alfredo sauce in my mind”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Joe Abdullah. Hello Joe Abdullah”, he said to the next caller, whose only words were “fold, fold” before getting disconnected. “No, no, you are not going to get on the air saying ‘fold Tide fold’. So call back on another day”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Norman. Hello Norman”, he said to the next caller. “Roll Tide Roll”, Norman said slowly before our host responded with a shout of the Alabama Crimson Tide battle cry. “If you look at the drawings (maps)”, said Norman, “the only parts they want to annex are the money parts”. “The majority of it is just new taxes”, according to Norman. “It’s the same old Mike Dow (former mayor of Mobile) politics to reach your hand in my pocket”, said Norman, who described the plan as “a bunch of garbage, a bunch of hooey”. “The taxes these people—the taxes are following them outside the city limits”, said the Uncle. “You’re right”, said Norman. Before leaving us, “God bless you, God bless America, and Roll Tide Roll”, said Norman. “Thank you for that, thank you very much”, said the Uncle before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

Today’s 9:00 AM half-hour gets a 7/10!

“Not Rainy Yet” – TV5 meteorologist John Nodar

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Today's Show




We start off today's show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710 on a beautiful Thursday morning. Fair skies, we are at 79 degrees. Anybody talking about this guy, Michael Phelps’ diet”, said the Uncle. “He’s not going to swim five hours a day for the rest of his life, so he’s going to have to learn to eat like a normal person, so that’s going to be a very difficult transition for him”, the Uncle continued. “What a lifestyle change that will be!” he predicts. “Have they had any Mark Spitz, have they brought him in at all?” the Uncle asked about another well known, but former swimmer. “All right, Trey Lane doesn’t know who Mark Spitz is. Isn’t that amazing?” said the Uncle before asking the show’s call screener if he knows who gymnast Nadia Comaneci is. “All right, he knows that”, said the Uncle before switching back to the former swimmer. “I think he remained trimmed after his career. Didn’t he become a dentist or something?” said the Uncle. “Here is a public service announcement for you: there is going to be a big trooper blitz next week”, he said to his fellow drivers. “They will also target driving behaviors, which includes following too closely which I experience everyday. Everyday of my life that someone rides up on my rear end”, said the Uncle. “Don’t you know how dangerous it is to ride up on someone like that?” he asked, “Well, they’re going to be targeting that” “They are also going to be targeting driver inattention. Well, that could be almost anyone”, according to our host. “I have seen people reading books while they’re driving on Government Street. People with the different cell phones trying to operate those things”, said the Uncle. “You may think you’re a good driver, but you may be involved in something they call driver inattention”, he said before speaking to this hour’s caller Nick. “Just a couple of days ago I was going down Highway 90 going toward Tillman’s Corner”, said Nick, who noticed a driver he referred to as a “fellow” who was distracted by his cellular phone. “Luckily I was able to get off the road and blow my horn”, said Nick. “You have a good day and oh, it’s a better day today”, said Nick before leaving us. “Let’s talk to Michael”, said the Uncle. “Henry, what’s happening?” Michael said to greet our host. “A little of this, a little of that”, the Uncle answered before Michael brought to our attention drivers ‘farding’, which may have sounded like an unpleasant word to some listeners. “I believe it’s F-A-R-D, which I believe is like grooming, like grooming your hair”, said the Uncle, who recalled hearing the term on the nationally syndicated radio program “The Rush Limbaugh Show”. “I’m a first time caller”, said our next caller Nan. “I would like to let you know that Mark Spitz is not at the Olympics”, said Nan, who heard the former swimmer on “The Today Show” speak about swimmer Michael Phelps surpassing his record wins. “He was a very gentlemanly about it”, according to Nan. “Records are meant to be broken”, said the Uncle. “You’re right”, said Nan. “He was just watching it like all the other Americans”, she said before leaving us. “Thank you, Uncle Henry”, Nan concluded her call. “You know today is National Creamsical Today, in case you didn’t know”, said our next caller Paul before recalling a plan by Sam Jones, the mayor of Mobile, to hire 80 new police officers. “Whatever happened to that plan?” Paul asked our host. “I would like to know and I’d welcome you inviting him to your show to ask him how he’s going to hire 80 in his term”, said Paul. “I’m sure he has a good plan”, said Paul, who wonders how the plan will be carried out. Before taking a break for commercials, “(251) 479-2723 is the number. Uncle Henry Show moving on”, said the Uncle. After interrupting the first commercial all of a sudden, “Before I get to this commercial, I want you to hear the voices of the water cooler with Trey Lane playing the part of a water cooler”, the Uncle explained. After the break, music from the Fleischer animated “Superman” shorts was used as bumper music. “Uncle Henry Show progressing. Beautiful day, I am going to—I don’t know what kind of show I’m going to have for you tomorrow”, said the Uncle, who will be “taming his now wild yard” and may be tired on Friday’s show. “It will be due to the over exertion I will be having over my lawn today”, said the Uncle. “I received a couple of e-mails from the people watching the show instead of listening to it”, said the Uncle, who appreciated those messages before “going into game show mode” with some suitable music for this $50 gift certificate giveaway for Naman’s Meat Market in Mobile. “The first person who can correctly identify the Uncle Henry Show mystery voice. Let’s listen”, said the Uncle, who played some audio of the voice of John Tyson, Jr., the district attorney for Mobile County saying, “I fight crime”, which was enough for listeners such as me to quickly identify. “No, it’s not Jo Bonner”, our host said to the first caller after the audio clip. One call later, “You are absolutely right, John, congratulations. You have won the $50 gift certificate from Naman’s Meat Market”, said the Uncle. “Thank you, Uncle Henry”, said John, whom our host told to stand by for the “professional musician” and call screener Trey Lane to get his contact information in order to send the gift certificate. “Thanks, John”, the Uncle responded. “Yes, that was John Tyson, Jr. from his run for attorney general”, said the Uncle before playing more of the clip. “He may do better next time around”, our host predicts. “I may give away more (gift certificates) later. So, Trey Lane, stay aware of that”, said the Uncle. “I saw a news report saying they led a soft opening of the store (Bass Pro Shop) yesterday”, said the Uncle. “I met some people who loved them so much that they took a vacation and drove to one”, he remembers. “So it must really be something”, he supposed. “Let’s talk to Jackson. Hello Jackson”, he said to the next caller. “I’ve been a longtime listener”, said Jackson. “And I believe you are a Christian”, he said to our host. “Correct”, the Uncle responded. “Am I right? Am I right?” Jackson asked before reminding our host of the saying, “Love your enemies”. “I don’t know if there’s a problem with your phone, Jackson, but I am suppose to love every man and every woman”, said the Uncle, but he still would not vote for certain folks running for public office no matter how much he loves them. “That doesn’t make me a bad guy just because I wouldn’t want to vote for them or they have anything correct in their philosophies”, the Uncle explained before taking a break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. A lovely Thursday as we get close to ‘Ask the Expert’ here on NewsRadio 710”, said the Uncle, who mentioned another radio program on his station. “Another drug and alcohol free day”, our next caller Bill said about himself today. “Good”, the Uncle responded. “Have you met Alec Naman?” Bill asked about the local caterer. “Yes”, the Uncle answered. “He’s a good cook, he knows what he’s actually doing, he runs a great business”, said Bill among his compliments for Alec Naman. “Uncle Henry, you need to get a riding lawn mower, one of those small mowers so you don’t [get] a heart attack”, Bill suggested. “You’ll feel a whole lot better and you won’t feel so exhausted”, he said before leaving us. “It sounded like he had notes”, said the Uncle, who found Bill’s call “well prepared” before speaking to caller Franklin about a national political party convention. “Well, Franklin, I want to thank you for your phone call, a phone call of dire importance”, said the Uncle before the next caller. “What is this sports magazine article about Nick Saban?” the caller asked our host, who responded that according to the article by the financial (not sports) magazine Forbes, the Alabama Crimson Tide football coach is “one of the most powerful” in sports. “What do you think about the vice presidential choices?” our next caller Chuck asked about the second highest executive position in the USA’s federal government. “They have just about named every politician we have”, said the Uncle. As the call screener comes into the studio, “I’m playing the Trey Lane summon, summoning Trey Lane to the microphone”, said the Uncle. “They have announced more performers to the BayFest”, said the Uncle as he gets to the first of the three performers: the O’Jays. “The ‘Love Train’ people are coming to Mobile”, said the Uncle before asking Trey Lane for his thoughts about the musical group. “I just don’t love the O’Jays”, said Trey. “So you’re a fan of the O’Jays, but you don’t like ‘Love Train’ ”, our host understood before bringing to our attention the group known as the Stylistics. “We don’t have any Stylistics here but Christmas music”, said the Uncle before finding the right music. “It’s kind of bland”, said Trey after being asked for his thoughts. “Now I’m upset about this one because of the nastiness”, said the Uncle, who considers the group’s music pornographic. “Uh oh”, said Trey before our host played music by Rock Steady. “I like that song”, said Trey. “I’m sure you do”, the Uncle responded. “Hey, Henry, did you see the picture of Nick Saban on the front page”, said our next caller, who wonders if the coach is laughing about what his contract pays him. “Are you saying he enjoys ripping off Alabama?” the Uncle asked the caller. “It’s all about the money, Uncle Henry, it’s all about the money”, according to the caller. After he reminded our host of yesterday’s call by “someone” (frequent caller Freddie was unnamed) who “wanted to abolish the stock market”. “So yes, we do have an undercurrent of communism in this country”, said the Uncle. “The bitterness toward Nick Saban keeps me from coming into full agreement with you”, said the Uncle after ending the call due to time constraints. After the final break for today, “Uncle Henry Show continues on NewsRadio 710 and concludes in just a moment”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Ron. Hello Ron”, he said to the final caller for today. “The last caller to me sounded like a socialist or a liberal that says the government should help us”, said Ron, who wonders what that caller “does for a living”. “Nobody is handing anyone anything. I don’t believe it. You earn it”, said Ron. “Very good, Ron. Thank you”, said the Uncle. “We have ‘Ask the Expert’ coming up the next after the news, followed by ‘The Rush Limbaugh Show’ at 11:00 and then ‘The (Todd) Schnitt Show’, which was very good this week”, said the Uncle. “If you’re in doubt of what to do, read what is in your Bible”, he reminded listeners at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets an 8/10!

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Today's Show




We start off today's show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. It is 9:05, five minutes after 9:00. It is still a wonderful Wednesday morning, there is rain”, said the Uncle. “The telephone number, the Harbor Communications hotline number is (251) 479-2723, that’s 479-2723, 479-2723”, he said before giving listeners the toll free number. “I mentioned that right at 9 o’clock I [got] a voice mail”, said the Uncle. “If you’re watching the show, would you please e-mail me and tell me what I look like today”, said the Uncle. “A lot of callers would call up and say, ‘I would like to talk to your viewers, Uncle Henry’ ”, our host remembers. “Let’s talk to Johnny—Johnny is with us. Hello Johnny!” he said to the first caller this hour. “You’re right, I expect good things from John Parker Wilson this year”, said the Uncle in agreement with Johnny on the Alabama Crimson Tide football quarterback before losing the caller, who was thanked for bringing up University of Alabama football on the show. “Again, if you’re viewing the show, the e-mail address is unclehenry@newsradio.com”, the Uncle reminded listeners. “What have I written on the backboard for today”, our host asked the “viewers” out there as the “Freddie Alert System” sound effect blares in the background “as a public service” to the listeners, a warning for drivers to pull over, and a nuisance to me. “A little education for you, there are people in this country that think that anybody—there shouldn’t be a stock market! But it’s—look, yeah, people make money in the stock market everyday, Freddie”, said the Uncle. “You have heard Jerry McCutchen preach everyday on this radio station for many years”, he said about the financial expert from the McCutchen Company in Mobile. “Let’s talk to Tommy. Hello Tommy”, he said to the next caller, who had a “Roll Tilde” shout for our host before discussing a salute for a candidate running for the presidency of the USA. “That’s the big problem with the salute you need to use both hands. Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. After the break and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Let’s talk to Holly. Hello Holly”, said the Uncle. “Isn’t it great today”, said Holly, who “loves the wind and rain”. “Here’s a great idea: when you have to be gone, have Freddie and Bill”, Holly suggested. “We have five microphones in this room”, said the Uncle, who suggested call screener Trey Lane to be in front of one of those microphones. “We’ll have Bill and Freddie and maybe Steve and ‘The Idea Guy’ and we’ll have a complete roundtable on the Uncle Henry Show”, said the Uncle before Holly suggested having Tim, also known as Sam Marston IV, and ‘The Commish’, also known as Steve Nodine of the Mobile County Commission. “I wouldn’t have to come back to work, they can replace me. That would be the highest rated show (ever)”, said the Uncle. While speaking to the caller following Holly, “Look, Steve, I’ve got to run. The news is coming in the next 10 seconds”, said the Uncle, who would “have to wonder” the salutes for presidential candidates.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Harbor Communications hotline number (251) 479-2723 or 1-888-360-WNTM”, said the Uncle before speaking to caller Clay. “Yes, I know there was a ‘W’ sign. I’m not sure if it was official or not”, said Clay, who was speaking about another presidential salute. “Thank you so much. Trey Lane just did it (the salute) to me”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Ron. Hello Ron”, he said to the next caller. “Uncle Henry, I just tried to call a second time”, said Ron before bringing to our attention “a new Olympic controversy” involving lip-syncing and two young girls. “They switched out one girl for the other”, said the Uncle, who heard of the news story. “You certainly can’t trust a country to puts out its best face, so to speak”, said Ron. “It’s certainly an odd story that they care so much about [one’s] physical appearance”, said the Uncle. “You have a face for radio, Uncle Henry”, said Ron before leaving us. “The Chinese culture is certainly different for someone not to be on TV like that”, said the Uncle. “I’ll check in with Trey Lane here, I’ve got a story out from the world of science and I want to share it with you here”, said the Uncle as the call screener’s theme music plays. “What color is my cape today?” he asked the call screener. “What color is the cape for you has been asked?” said Trey, who was referring to our host’s earlier question for his “viewers”. “Oh never mind”, said the Uncle before doing a “public service” by sharing one particular news article with Trey Lane. “If this is true and they claim it is so that a woman is attracted to a man with the best smelling cologne, what happens if the man smells himself”, said the Uncle. “A woman’s flowery fragrance, I still don’t know what that means”, he admitted after reading the news article. “This is one thing that doesn’t factor into my life”, said the Uncle. “It’s kind of an indelicate question, because you’re going to have to ask if they are on ‘The Pill’ all ready”, said the Uncle. “This is very odd, weird something to factor in. So you’re going to have to ask, maybe on your MySpace page and have a standard question for a woman” to “make sure they’re not on ‘The Pill’ ”, the Uncle continued. “This gives you something to think about and certainly plants a seed in a woman’s mind” to net a husband, said the Uncle. After Trey Lane’s laughter, “All right, I’m turning your microphone down”, said the Uncle, whose call screener was still heard on the air after that. “If you were to stick on my path—all right, Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle before the break. After the break and a voice message, music from one of the “Pink Panther” movies was used as bumper music. “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. You know, in this area, ‘Idea Guy’, they have condos where I work. In fact, Dot Moore used to live in one of those condos”, said the Uncle, who is unsure about living in a condominium with his dog in public. “I may look into the Dot Moore condo. Let’s talk to Roger. Hello Roger, good morning”, he said to the next caller. “I want you to look back in the conversation we had the other day about the invisibility cloak”, said Roger, who saw a report about such a thing on “The Early Show” on WKRG-TV5. As for the scientific study brought up earlier, “That might be some type of pheromone”, according to Roger. “Fascinating to hear from you again as you work on your fertility book—not your fertility book, your invisibility book”, said the Uncle, who wonders if an invisibility cloak would affect a fellow’s histocompatibility gene. “Somebody get my grandson some of this Axe (spray). I really resent that. I don’t know how there can be a right amount”, said the Uncle before speaking to the next caller. “An invisibility cloak will not help you (get a woman)”, our host told the caller “If you were to get little invisibility patches on your forehead, it would make you [look] thinner”, he suggested before the break, including a live commercial. “Uncle Henry Show brought to you in part by delicious Hall’s Meats”, the Uncle began a live promotion for the popular meat product from Chickasaw, Alabama. Immediately after the live commercial, “All right, we are out of time on the Uncle Henry Show. We have ‘Ask the Expert’ next”, said the Uncle. “You’re going to get some very good information from these people”, he said about the veterinarians scheduled to be on “Ask the Expert”. “Remember to pray and read that Bible”, the Uncle reminded listeners at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 6/10!

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